A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Let me start off by saying that I'm a 15 year old girl and I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend, 17, for over 5 months now. He recently just told me that he loved me. We're both so young. Is it possible to be in love at our age? What if he thinks he loves me but it's something else? Please help! Thanks. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, A Cappella +, writes (21 October 2008):
 I have always thought that so-called "Puppy Love" was real. It's not that you feel it any less or that it could hurt you any less -- it's that you're learning what it's all about.
Yes, you can be in real love.
It's even possible that you could be with this person forever. But it's not likely. Talk to any 30-year-old you know and ask them "whatever happened to the person you were with when you were my age?" I bet you 95%+ will say: you know, I haven't thought about him/her in years! (They might also add "I was really in love with him/her" but they won't be with them now.)
If he says it, I'm sure he feels it. But just because he truly feels it doesn't mean that it will last forever. (Or your love, if any, for him either). Enjoy the feeling now, and don't worry about it. Good luck hon.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 October 2008): Here is the short answer...
First of all it is possible to be in Love at any age it just depends on what Love you are talking about... To understand whether you are in Love you have to understand what Love is...
As far as I have been able to determine there are principally 5 categories of Love the Ancient Greeks named them Eros, Philia, Storge, Xenia and Agape
You've probably met Eros already and it needs no introduction "The Phwoar I couldn't half fancy you and certain feelings both you and your boyfriend have trouble controlling ie you cant keep your hands off each other!!!
Philia is simply the Love we have for friends the companionship camararderie the rushing to the defence of a friend etc.
Storge is the Love for family a mother to a child sister brother father daughter etc
Xenia is the love of the stranger the lift to the hitchiker or shelter in a storm or the giving of money when someone doesn't have the fare or giving to charity
Agape pure Love true Love self sacrificial Love the I would give my life for you Love
Agape encompasses all the others and crucially it is the only one that demands nothing in return. A good relationship (or marriage) needs agape in abundance
So what are the characterestics of Agape, In his letter to Corinth Paul describes Agape Love thus
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
In short Love is not simply an emotional or sexual feeling True Love demands a series of conscious decisions and choices
So for example if someone says to You "You would have sex with me if you loved me" then according to the criteria that isn't love because it is one sided manipulative and self seeking.
Finally don't worry if you can't match all love's virtues not many can
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 October 2008): I know how you feel. The truth is that there is no possible way to know. Often when a person thinks they are in love, they later find out that they werent. However, it also turns out that the person truly is in love. Truth be told the only way to truly know if he loves you is to see how long he stays interested in you. But clearly he has strong feelings for you if you've lasted 5 months at your age. But it is DEFINATELY possible to love in your teen years, don't worry about that.
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