A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a problem and it's quite weird so I don't quite know who else to talk to. Background: I've been going out with this lovely man for 2 years now. He is 28 and I'm 22. I've always received a lot of male attention but I never met the person I wanted until him. He was gentler, more considerate, better at conversation and less 'blokish' altogether.At first I was really drawn towards his delicate features. He's really skinny, geeky and weak and -believe it or not- his hands are much smaller than mine even though is 5'8 and I'm 5'5. I love to have really long french manicured nails, which makes the difference even worse, but luckily he seems to like that.On to the point. Right from the start, I found it incredibly easy to give him sexual satisfaction. He would climax 3 to 4 times a day easily. However, two years into the relationship I am yet to climax myself. It has not happened once. Seriously. Not even remotely close! The only thing I could do was resort to it myself. Now, before you say anything, we've tried all positions and though some are better than others, still I can feel very little. The trouble is: he's incredibly small down there, 4in, by far the smallest boyfriend I've ever had.Now, I know you're about to criticize me, but last month, on a night out with the girls, I bumped into an old ex of mine, who I remember being incredibly well-endowed down there. Before you know, I ended up at his place, we made love and it took me like 3 minutes to climax. It was amazing and made me realise what I was missing.I actually appreciated for the first time his muscly body, his big hands and his more "manly" manners. I didn't want to be horrible to my b/f, so I told him the whole truth, hoping that he'd say something drastic. However, all he could come up with was "I forgive you as long as you don't do it again" which quickly turned into "are you gonna dump me now? Please don't" which put me in a total position of power as it was clear he was ready to put up with anything. I swore I wasn't gonna do it, but it's as if the naughty night out opened a can of worms. Now, whenever I'm out with the girls and men start chatting me up, I no longer hold back and I've been cheating on my boyfriend about 3 times in a month already with different men- and all of them have been burly types with biceps at least 3 times the size of my partner. I told my boyfriend about all of them and the only result is that he seems to be incredibly turned on. He denies it's to do with jealousy, but the truth is he just doesn't leave me alone. I love his attention, but sexually I am now officially attracted to his opposite: someone manly, assertive, with big hands and something else I mentioned earlier.What can I do? Is this just a phase or have I gone to far? And would a threesome that involves my boyfriend help solve the problem? Please help me, I don't want to hurt his feelings!
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male
reader, RAINORFIRE  +, writes (14 July 2009):
 interesting.. If hes willing to put up with you seeing other men and you still want to be with him i dont see the problem you kno longer have to lie about it he seems like a guy that really cares about you and loves you if you leave him fo some guy with a big dck but no love for you you will regret sex is a few moments of pleasure and shouldnt be the bases of a relationship, you need to be completely open and honest with him hes a man he deserves the truth from you tell him that you cant climax with him because of his size but you want to be with him you just need a guy that can make you climax sometimes have you tried using sex toys or stimulating creams, I feel you shouldnt break up with this guy over sex because he seems to really care about you and the sex doesnt last any way its better to be in a good loving relationship then just a sexual one and since hes willing to let you sleep with other men to get your climax whats the problem .
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your feedback.About half an hour ago, I told him I wanted to end our relationship, that I was seeing someone else. He kept asking me what he other guy's got that he hasn't etc and I didn't wanna be horrible so I managed to fend off those questions.But guess what though: he said he's willing to let me see "the other bloke" as long as he can remain my boyfriend! He said he hopes that after a while I can just be his and that's it.I actually cried saying why he's doing this to me but he keeps saying he loves me and no-one else would go for someone as small as he is! This is turning nuts.What can I do??? :-(
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A
male
reader, Flash71  +, writes (13 July 2009):
I think you need to leave him ASAP. What you are doing now has got to be destroying whatever is left of his pride and self esteem. By staying you are remaining unhappy and he is quite possibly going to be scarred for life relationship wise (if he's not already). You would be doing him a favour by going. You might also want to think about the value of loyalty, honesty and trust in relationships.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2009): Have some respect for him and end it.
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