A
female
age
30-35,
*elpquickly
writes:X and i had this brother sister thing going on at first and made it very public.we got very close and we even have the same friends. later, i realized that i had a crush on him (X)i told him that one day and after a brief period of not talking to each other, we started talking again. i got myself a boyfriend immediately and we've been together for 2 years now. One drunken night, X and i ended up having sex with each other and we have been in a friends with benefits relationship for over a year now, behind my boyfriend's back. the problem is, i'm still attracted to X. X and i dont discuss this as it would be weird because my parents know him as my brother, his mother knows it and everybody in college knows it!!! i dont know what X feels about this. in our culture brothers and sisters even though not related by blood is still taboo. X has made it very clear that he doesnt want a relationship, perhaps hinting at me. is there a possibility for me to get together with X in the future or is he just using me for sex? but X and i are very good friends and i have this little hope that one day he might see something in me....
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crush, drunk, friend with benefits, period Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2012): Being an Indian I can understand that the X wants to use you as long as feels good but only for sex not any thing else and he will never try understand you as you're telling he will one day understand, and your words shows that you have love for X but he is not and you since you had sex with both deffinately you will feel for both. Now think, the way how you a relationship with X and don't you think he has similar stories with others
A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (12 March 2012):
 Well, I don't see why is would deter an ongoing relationship. But there are probably more issues going on here than you have revealed. Talk with the one you want and get rid of the other, or enjoy the fun. You are still very young.
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A
female
reader, helpquickly +, writes (12 March 2012):
helpquickly is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you DoubleM, Sageoldguy1465 and anonymous.I am sexually active with both my boyfriend and X. My boyfriend is an excellent guy but i don't love him. He has done a lot for me. He cared for me when i was sick, helped me through my exams and has been very kind. Since last year, he has been falling ill time and again and i don't want to leave him alone when he needs me. I'm only keeping it up till he finishes college and goes back to his state. He has no intention of starting an LDR or getting married etc. I have stopped sleeping with X for over a month now and we're still talking( on the phone) for over an hour at a time. It's pleasant and he hasn't shown any sign of anger or disinterest. No, he isn't in any other relation. We're very close friends so, he tells me everything.I would like to know what your take is on everybody knowing that he is my brother( not blood related). Does that destroy the scope of a future relationship?
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A
female
reader, helpquickly +, writes (12 March 2012):
helpquickly is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you DoubleM, Sageoldguy1465 and anonymous.I am sexually active with both my boyfriend and X. My boyfriend is an excellent guy but i don't love him. He has done a lot for me. He cared for me when i was sick, helped me through my exams and has been very kind. Since last year, he has been falling ill time and again and i don't want to leave him alone when he needs me. I'm only keeping it up till he finishes college and goes back to his state. He has no intention of starting an LDR or getting married etc. I have stopped sleeping with X for over a month now and we're still talking( on the phone) for over an hour at a time. It's pleasant and he hasn't shown any sign of anger or disinterest.I would like to know what your take is on everybody knowing that he is my brother( not blood related). Does that destroy the scope of a future relationship?
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (11 March 2012):
Should we assume that you are sexually active with both your friend and your boyfriend? Does your "friend" also have relations with others? If true, then it would seem you are doing what a lot of guys try to do - which is to have multiple lovers. That's ok if that's what you want, but I think you have some decisions to make.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (11 March 2012):
 Girls who are content to have a "FWB" "relationship" often learn that the GUY who is taking part with them REALLY WANTS an "FWB" relationship.... whilest THEY secretly want a "REAL" relationship....
The two are incompatible - to the MAXIMUM!!!!
Once you figure that out, you will "know" what is the answer to the question that you posed herein....
Good luck....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2012): You're friends with benefits so you are both using each other for sex behnd your boyfriend's back. Why would X change that? If X is who you want to be with then why are you stringing your boyfriend along? You think by having sex with X he will suddenly fall in love with you? If it hasn't happened in the last year what makes you think it will ever happen?
Stop sleeping with X and see what happens...
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