A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I'm a guy who rarely watches hardcore porn but I do like female forms, so will sometimes watch very simple videos of a girl removing clothes or posing nude. I've been noticing that in some cases, with just the "right" (to my mind) face and body type, doing certain poses, seen from certain angles, it all comes together and something "clicks" in my brain. My eyes start squinting, jaw falls open, face turns red, and I even start gasping or groaning. (I also mastrubate during this.) Whats going through my head is pure shock and awe (OMG) at the beauty I'm seeing, like it almost hurts to look at. Don't get me wrong, it feels soo good to be in this "mode". But... is it normal? I know my reactions look terrible and I often feel embarrassed after.Asked a couple of people online about this.One said it sounded weird and abnormal. Another said she thought it was totally normal and healthy too. I'm an artistic person and truly believe that the female face and form are the most beautiful things the natural world has produced. do I just have an extra sensitivity or something? should I worry about this?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (11 April 2017):
I don't think you should worry about it. Honestly you are doing nothing wrong.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2017): Each and every person's physical and emotional reaction to sex is different, and the same could be said for porn. The people's opinion you asked online wouldn't help you get your head around your query, you'd need to ask a lot more people for their opinion before you get a general idea!
As for the objectifying thing, I agree with Honeypie but would go one step further- physical beauty and attraction is very objective and plays a big part in sex. Of course, it's not all there is to sex. Honeypie is also right in that objectification isn't wrong in itself, depending on how you act upon it. So don't worry- how you enjoy your porn is up to you! And remember, as a virgin, you've not experienced what the male body goes through during sex. It's kind of similar!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2017): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOh yes yes I can control it. It's only if I really relax, let go and do what comes naturally that I get in the zone. I never oogle women in public or talk about their bodies. I don't even believe in casual sex and am still virgin. So watching stuff once a week is my only sex life.
Used to worry about "objectifying" but the advice I got was that if it's a professional video of a professional model, then it's more of a performance and obviously the woman hopes and expects to be looked at, so there's no issue.
Never said this behaviour makes me creative or sensitive. By sensitive, I meant sensitive to stimulus. But considering I also own legitimate art books and artworks on the human form,and like to read essays on this subject, I do think it means more than just "T&A" to me.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 April 2017):
Sexually objectifying women? I think (even if it isn't politically or morally correct) it's pretty common. And yes, women do it too.
Does it mean you are somehow extra sensitive and creative... no.
It just means you are a horny person who prefers to make up your own "imaginary porn" using whenever someone that fits your "category or type" pops up.
Should you worry about it? Well, do you have CONTROL over it? Would you immediately grab your crotch if you were out and about and you saw a woman showing off a graceful calf or neck?
Can you CONTROL your urges in public? If you can... I don't really see the BIG deal, if you CAN'T - then yes it can be an issue as it can land you in legal trouble.
Are you married and these women are NOTHING like you wife, so you PREFER to "spend" time with "them" and your hand rather than being intimate with your wife?
So really, what it comes down to is DO you RESPECT the person you OBJECTIFY and can you CONTROL your urges?
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