A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My gf and i have dated for 4 years starting in college. We got along great, even after the initial infatuation had worn off. We were together all the time and truly enjoyed each others company. We were each others first real loves. We recently became long distance since she graduated and started a new job in the city where we are originally from. It has been hard on us, and I havent been giving her enough attention. I have been trying to find a job, finish school, etc. They aren't good excuses, but its the truth. She hasn't enjoyed her job, she doesn't like the city, and she is living by herself, and when I come home I feel a lot of pressure to be with my family. This went on for 4 months before she broke up with me saying that she didn't think i wanted a future with her and that she needed space to become independent and happy in the new city, but wanted to be friends. I told her that I loved her, wanted to marry her, but that i was reluctant to talk about a future when i didn't know if i could even get a job near her. She said she wasn't sure anymore that I was the one. After the breakup she got over it in a few days, and I am obviously still struggling. I havent been giving her a whole lot of space and have visited her several times to try and win her back, but when we have talked she has said she just still needs to know she can be independent and be happy, and wants me to date other people. When I ask if she sees us together again, she says she cant make any promises. I have decided to give her space, and be her friend once i can handle it, but I am wondering if this is a lost cause.
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female
reader, Ima FreAk!  +, writes (23 March 2011):
 Hiya!!!!!
Firstly I'm from England so I'm my personality might come on strong! WARNING! And no I'm not eating fish n chips! (it's not Friday yet hehe :P)
You deserve better that's all I can say because you still have feelings for her and it must be painful to see her with someone else but remember that your young! You still have a life ahead of you and you can't get tied down with someome that doesn't understand you.
School sucks trust me and I feel a lot of pressure too so your definitely not alone I'll tell you honey that pressure is a right pain in the arse!
But back to the point, honestly you should move on because this world is full of opportunities and grab em! Why pick up pebbles when you can pick a diamond? Patience is virtual so wait for you special "gal" to touch your shoulder and truely love everything about you, even your flaws.
Please put a smile! Even though I can't see it please smile!!!! And once you smile show it to the world!!!
Good luck with your bright future!
Lots of love,
Ima FreAk!
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