A
female
age
30-35,
*aria.niz
writes:Hi everyone :)My boyfriend and I have just broken up, well, he broke up with me something like 6 days ago. Now he's in NYC and he's coming back next week. He broke up with me because he told me that he didn't love me anymore, and he also told me that I don't have to hope that me and he will get back together once he comes back. The problem is: I don't want to move on. I still believe in our relationship, I truly do. Most of all, I do not think I will find another guy like him. He was perfect to me, and I am so afraid 1)of being alone2) of losing him.I want to get him back, but my "rational side" has already understood that it's over. Do you think that one day I will find love again? I think I am not able anymore to fall in love. He was my soulmate. What do you do once you lose your soulmate? Will I ever feel better?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (15 July 2013):
 yes you do
my dad met my mom when she was 16 and he was 19. they married 3 years later... 48 years later she died in his arms. He cried for the first and only time I've ever seen him cry.
He met another woman and has been with her 18 years.
yes there is more than one love out there for each of us
you just have to heal and be open to it later on.
and yes you will feel better if you allow yourself to. DO NOT try to hold on to the pain, there is no need.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2013): You're young, and relationships at your age aren't meant to last too long.
You are in a phase of your live where you should be educating yourself, and discovering who you are. You're still very early in your development toward womanhood.
Just by your question, you are admitting you have a lot of growing up to do. You will feel sorrow and pain for the loss of your boyfriend. I know how it hurts.
Yes, you will find happiness in the future. You don't have to always have a boyfriend to be happy. You'll survive, my dear!
Read this:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-got-dumped-and-i-know-how-.html
I wrote it because I got dumped by someone I thought was perfect for me too. I hope it will make you feel a little better. You will; even if you don't read it. It just takes some time.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (13 July 2013):
 i think that you are just feeling like most people feel after a true heart break. but the thing is, sweetie, if he was really your soul mate, one of two things will happen.
1.) you two will get back together in time, because it is destiny, right? so live your life and move on and if it's meant to be, it will come back. don't place your life on hold, waiting for him. fate is fate, right?
or
2.) if you two broke up, he wasn't really your soul mate in the first place, and the person you're meant to be with is still out there.
either way, you need to move on. often times, people think they feel a certain way right after a devistating break up, but look back after only just a few short months, and realize the reality. that they weren't as happy as they had thought. once you've had a chance to detach from these sad emotions and missing him, you'll see the relationship for what it was and more from reality. i know it's just hard to do/see that right now, while you're hurting and he's still perfect in your eyes.
when my ex and i broke up, i was devistated. i thought the same thing. that we were soul mates and i was lost. after just a short month, i reflected and saw the relationship for what it really was. i realized we had a lot of fights and misunderstandings. that we were incompatible. i realized my ex had done us a favor by ending it. but i didn't see that at the time.
i promise, you'll get through this. just be patient and be strong. best wishes.
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