A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been seeing this girl for about 9 months now. She, like most of the Gfs Ive had, made the first move and was the one to come out and say that they loved me. At first I was kind of skeptical and non believing that she really loved me, but she eventually grew on me. Well things have been pretty rough this past month, me trying to get into college and her getting accepted into the college that will take her out of the state, albeit not very far, but out nonetheless. We very recently began to be sexually active, and things have really seemed to take a turn for the worst since we did. first off i've felt insecure ever sense we started. 2ndly ive recently discovered that she is wanting to become friends again with her ex, whose relationship ended when he attempted to rape her. She says that she forgives him and wants to be his friend again. I'm less than convinced. Well today i Stumbled on a conversation that they had and for a lack of better words, it looks like they both think im terrible at the sex. so now im personally insulted and hurt, not so much at the sucking, but at the fact that she wouldnt tell me something like that, and worse to tell him. Then we had an awkward moment that left her going home to think about us. I'm just wondering Is there anything I can do to save this relationship? was there something i did wrong or didnt do? Should i dump her? please help me as i dont think i can make a decison right now :'(
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male
reader, wisdomiselusive  +, writes (13 March 2010):
Make sure the info you are receiving is not a misunderstanding on your part - if not dump her. I MEAN, DUMP HER FAST. If she likes you she will make more of an effort and respect you more. If you have done your homework about sex and how to please a women (remembering that they all a little different)And are following what you have learned - YOU CANT BE BAD AT SEX - I'LL REPEAT THAT - YOU CANT BE BAD AT SEX. You are just out of sync with her and she is the one drifting.Let me tell you something VERY VERY IMPORTANT. The BRAIN is the biggest, most important sexual organ - I know you have probably heard it before but, it is true.When someone is not into you sexually of something is getting in the way (IN THEIR HEADS) THEY will blame you and say it is you or your lack of ability in bed or lack of ability in some other aspect of life.Many people are just dumb this way.Dont develop a hang up over not being in tune with someone.If she was into you properly and really loved you she would help you satisfy her.She is young silly and wanting things only multiple relationships ant the same time will be able to provide (bit only in her head)Life is too short Bud, - find someone on your level - it wont be easy as you sound like you have it all together albeit that you are slightly inexperienced in some aspectsAnd, not many people have it together.And, most importantly, there is much, much more to life than girlfriends - Trust me.I was where you are now, then I started a couple of businesses over a period of years and I have never looked back - my life is very full - I meet adoring people everyday and I can go anywhere in the world at the drop of a hat.And most importantly - MY CONFIDENCE IS THROUGH THE ROOF
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