A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:The other night my boyfriend said he sometimes gets upset because I'm not very good at saying what I feel about things. He gave the example of us moving in together - we've been talking about it a lot lately but he said everytime he asks me about it, I brush off the questions. It's true, I do - I always just say "yeah I want to move in with you" and that's it. So I made a big effort and told him about how I'm excited about it but a little bit nervous at the same time and want to make sure we both still get our own space etc. He was really happy I opened up and I felt closer to him. He just wants to listen to me and understand me, which I think is really special and rare in a guy. I don't ever want to push him away, I want to create more of this closeness between us by opening up about everything... but I honestly never think of ways to do it! If he hadn't mentioned how I brush off his questions, I never would have realised it. But I don't want it to be up to him to point it out to me every time. Is there anything I can do to learn to open up of my own accord? Some exercises to practice or things I can tell myself? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, sammi star  +, writes (4 February 2011):
 Now that he's brought it to your attention you will have more self awarness and you will realise when you're not opening up enough. I know you don't think that now but you will.
Don't force it, just keep it in the back of your mind and remind yourself of it whenever conversation calls for you to be more open. Don't go over the top just because this is what your bf wants, if you're not a naturally open person then that's just who you are but of course I'm not suggesting you don't try when the topic is discussing something big such as living together. Your bf will want the reassurance that this is wht you really want.
I'm guessing that you probably have thoughts that you don't actually say out loud so try letting him in on them.
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