A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:my boyfriend and I of 6 years have been fighting a lot. Most of the time its over small petty stuff but of coarse we have had some big problems too. We would like to know if theres a way or how to communicate calmly so it dont escalate? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (2 September 2010):
 Sit down and talk calmly to each other. If someone gets even a little agitated, stop for a moment, take a deep breath and just stop to think. Try to see each other's point of view. In an argument, one side often disregards anything the other side says. Try to understand his point of view and tell him that he needs to at least TRY to see yours.If you love each other, you have all the reason in the world not to fight over petty things. Little habits can be changed, if he forgets to leave the toilet seat down, don't argue about it, instead, ask him calmly, let him know that he has to change it but don't yell.A child never learns when things are being yelled at him, subconsciously, he/she will think that whatever he is doing is wrong even if he/she does it right. The same applies to an adult.I hope that helps.
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