A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hey - I'm moving on from a long failed marriage and while I am not interested in any affairs and relationships at the moment I do realise that in time I'll feel the void. Is there an average time it takes to get over things and feel alive again and be ready to socialise and move out again. Right now it's all very fresh and I keep to myself, do my work and pretty quiet in general; still recovering I think.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2012): I believe it does vary in every relationship.
In my marriage? I was the one that wanted to divorced him. We were together for 7 + years with kids. I was over it pretty quickly because I was the one that wasn't happy with him.) He was broken hearted for over a year... ( I wish it took him 15 mins. or less ) lol! :@
It does seem you are on the right track :) Keep busy, be with family & do nice things for yourself. Time heals. You will find someone special when it's right for you.
A
female
reader, diamondshards  +, writes (28 August 2012):
There are so many factors playing a role here...how long the marriage lasted, how long were you two together before getting married, do you have any children, how and why did it end, did you file or did he, had it been over long before you actually separated, what kind of person are you, do you hold on to things in a really constant way or are you better at letting them go...
All these things are important in determining how big of an emotional baggage you'll have to deal with- the bigger it is, the more time it will take for you to get over it. Regardless of that, it's not going to be easy, but it's possible and many people have to face such hardships everyday, many people have and managed to overcame them before you- you're going to be okay in time, however long or short that may be, and even focusing on the fact there's a light at the end of the tunnel can help.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2012): I believe this is something that varies with different people.
Also a contributing factor is whether or not a person wants to move on and is determined enough to do so.
You sound like you're in the right frame of mind to move on, and are doing the vital thing to help you do it , which is keeping busy and getting on with your daily life as normal, keeping focused and sticking to your guns.
Another thing that is important to remember is: People managed fine before the (now broken down) relationship, and they will do again after.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (28 August 2012):
 While females seem to anguish over "how long" it takes to "get over a failed relationship"..... Most guys can do so ("get over it") in 15 minutes or less. It MIGHT take a little longer if the break-up occurs during the last few laps of a NASCAR races.... but NEVER more than the duration of that race....
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