A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: On a week long school trip a friend asked me to put suncream on his back, I got really turned on. Since then I have had gay fantasies about him. I have only told my closest mate about me being possibly gayShould I tell the person? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, LauraE +, writes (13 August 2007):
Hi,
I wouldn’t rush into telling him as you are not sure yourself. Things can’t be unsaid, and you might regret telling him if he reacts badly, or if you realise it was just a phase. The only way to tell if you are gay is how you feel about other people of both sexes over a longer time. If you have also fancied girls, you might be bisexual, or straight but curious. Loads of straights have had the odd gay fantasy. Like Penta said, you don’t have to be one or the other. Just relax about it, and see how things develop.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2007): Why catgegorise yourself? My philosophy is that I am waiting for the right person- if they are right for me and i am right for them then I dont care if they are male or female. The fact is I wont go loking for males to be 'the one' because im not attracted to men, but (as u can see this is hard to explain)if i was perfect for a man and v/v then i dunno.
This didnt help much im sorry
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2007): No. Don't tell him, verbally. You can try to get to know if he's interested in other ways.
Here's a for instance. A few years ago I was at a bar with my friend. We met these people there. Anyways, among them was this girl. She was soooo beautiful. (I don't necessarily mean that in a gay way, it's hard to explain). But she was tall. and long black hair. I thought she was very beautiful. And I guess she took a liking to me cause she started getting real touchy feely with me. BUT she never made me feel uncomfortable. And she was sitting me on her lap and running her fingers through my hair. I mean I guess we were down right flirting. And all her friends were like WTF? are you guys gay? And we didn't think anything of it. It just felt natural.
I think that is the best way to approach it if you want to see if there could be anything more. Just let it happen naturally at the right place right time.
As for the question "are you gay"? I don't know. I guess it is possible. yes.
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (13 August 2007):
Without knowing who else you're attracted to, it's hard to know. Human sexuality isn't binary (it's not just straight/gay), but it's along a bell curve. You could just be bi-curious. Have you been attracted to women too? I wouldn't worry about it. Even if you are gay, that would be just find. About 10 percent of the population are gay. Hang back and see what you feel before you do anything. Good luck.
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