A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:The weather has certainly gotten a lot colder in recent weeks. As a student, I try and save money by leaving the heating off in my house. My girlfriend is the same. The past couple of times we've had sex I have not had an orgasm, which is pretty rare. Just recently my sex drive has cooled down, and I wonder if weather is the cause of this, or whether it is something else.Me and my girlfriend have been inseparable since we both went back to university after Christmas, less separable than I would like to be. One night I suggested we give eachother some space and do our own thing and she accused me of being bored of her. We have only spent one night apart since new years and I don't know what to do! AM I bored? Is it so wrong that I want to have a little time to myself now and then? Is the weather to blame for my loss of sex drive?
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christmas, money, orgasm, sex drive, university Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (13 January 2010):
You don't need a break from sex, you just need to have a break from her!
You need to stand up for yourself and tell her that you just need a day off with your mates doing boy stuff.
Then go out and have a day of drinking and farting and what ever it is boys do together. (I'm a girl I don't know.)
I'm sure you'll enjoy heading home to her when you've had time apart.
Also, try taking her out on a date, get ready separately so you only see the finished product, and go do something romantic.
Good Luck!! xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou were both very helpful, but the situation has only gotten worse.
I've tried explaining to my girlfriend that we need time apart, but she still believes that it means I've lost interest in her even though I've tried my best to explain to her that that isn't true. It's started to effect things in bed. We've had sex about five times in the past week or so, and in none of those sexual encounters have I been able to have an orgasm. This is making her think that I'm not attracted to her!! I feel unbelievably stressed out and it's taking it's tole on my manhood too. I feel pathetic. She has supported me in this, and has suggested that we take a break from sex. Do you think this will work? How can I get out of this mindset, because I absolutely must break this horrible cycle as soon as possible.
Please, please help me out!
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (9 January 2010):
You can't spend every single day together in a relationship as that is a sure fire way to ruin everything.
You NEED time apart from each other or you'll just both change and then get bored of each other. Then she'll meet a rugged guy who does his own thing, or you'll meet a wild girl who's really independent... and suddenly that cuddly other half in a big jumper at home who calls you snugglebunny won't seem nearly as sexy.
She needs to get her own life so she can be girly self and not a girlfriend 100% of the time. You need your own space so you can go and be a bloke and do stupid man stuff with your mates, you don't want to be a well behaved boyfriend 100% of the time.
You didn't fall in love with a "girlfriend" you fell in love with HER. And it's the same the other way round.
Give yourself to miss the sexy gorgeous girl you first met.
Good Luck!! xx
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