A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok, I have this friend. Well really, a friend of a friend, But we always hang out. We're all girls.And this person doesn't always get on with me. She's really childish, irritating and insecure and sometimes she likes me sometimes she hates me for no reason. I try to get on with her mostly.But the point is she is such a hypocrite! She's really homophobic yet does things which are deffinatly gay.If she's in a bad mood with me, she says I'm gay, or anything she doesn't like is gay. And she'll point at one of my teachers and just say "You love her, you gay" or something like that. Ironically I am secretly in love with one of my female teachers, and thats one of the few ones she hasn't told me I love. But I unlike her am perfectly comfortable with my sexuality. I'm possibly bisexual,or attracted to guys with the exception of one female. and fine with it if I am. so she's homophobic but, sometimes she'll just squeeze my knee under the table or rub my leg. And once when we were in a tent, and she tried to straddle me, then I was doing press ups, and she stuck her foot up my crotch, well I had clothes on, thank god. And then I was leaning out of the tent to get something and she squeezed my ass. Is she gay? Does she have a crush on me or something? she doesn't do this to anybody else as far as I know. What should I do? I'm running out of smartarse comments like "i've had better" etc.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionno, she doesn't know I'm bi, actually nobody does, not because I'm afraid to, but because right now, theres only one woman who I'm attracted to and she's off-limits, therefore I have no reason to tell anybody I'm bi. It's an all girls school and they'd all think I fancied them.
I figured it's not just a one of cause, there was this other girl, she was always flirting with me, and rubbing my leg, except she left. And on the last day she said she was Bi. At that point I was in denial, and tried to ignore it. But I missed her all summer, I realised to late that I'm probably bi.
Well she knows I was interested in someone-else and currently another somebody else, both boys. she doesn't know I'm bi. And she is the LAST girl I would ever go out with. I'm not attracted to her one bit. What should I do about it though? I mean, she's going to keep ddoing stuff like this, and I don't want it. And then she's just going to be mean to me, and homophobic
A
female
reader, bday121  +, writes (15 May 2008):
 Yeah, I'd say this girl is definitely gay/bisexual. Does she know that you're bisexual ? If not, that could be why she keeps calling you gay..she's trying to get the truth out of you because she's into you. Or if she does know you're bi, maybe she's saying, "Oh, you love her" because she's trying to get you to say "No I don't, she's ugly!" or something like that. You know, she's hoping for a reply that tells her you're not interested in anyone else.
A lot of people start to realize in their teens that they're gay/bisexual and try to repress the urges. They think that homosexuality is wrong and they're embarrassed about their derires and afraid of them as well. So sometimes those people lash out against gays and trash homosexuals because it makes them feel better. You know, like, they hate that fact that they're homosexual, and bashing homosexuality makes them feel better. They think that if they deny and hate homosexuality that their own gay urges will go away.
Also, from some personal experience, I had a friend a few years back who was always kinda mean to me for no reason, made fun of my boyfriend a lot, and gave off some weird vibes toward me. We stopped being friends after a while, but turns out that recently she finally came out of the closet and is a lesbian! Now when I look back I think she might've had some sort of crush on me, and that's why she was so mean. Maybe that's what's going on with your friend?
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