A
male
age
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*ildman
writes: How do you really know if you are still in love or just used to someone and the regularity of it all? Is changing partners worth the consequences? Does second love make it worth while? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): You always know!
It's material things and social standing that keep people from acting on their true feelings, and they only have themselves to blame for the price they have to pay, ie the loveless relationship.
Follow your gut and risk being single if it doesn't work out or play safe and live a half-life, but with nice furniture!
A
female
reader, O Connor +, writes (4 March 2008):
cheating is not worth it - love is always worth it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2008): Good question, very hard to answer, indeed. Not the same answer for everyone, or every situation, either. It just depends on where you are at this point - so basically it's all you, haha. Is this what you really want? Or are you just finding reasons to doubt a good thing? Have you thought about life without the love you're with, and how it really would be? How okay would you be with having her marry someone else, have a life with someone else?
I really think it's only worth it when you really and truly feel like you have a real shot at being much happier than you are now. If you are happy now, maybe you're focusing on the wrong aspect of your life to change. Try to grow in other areas - learn a new hobby/trade, get involved in something you've always wanted to, focus on excelling at work, etc. See if this changes your perspective any.
If it's a feeling that won't go away no matter what you do, if it's a doubt that is just too nagging, then maybe talk to that first love about it, as scary as that sounds. What do you have to lose, really? You're just being honest about how you feel...
In the end, close your eyes and look inward, and you'll hear from deep down within whether or not you should stay or let go...
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