A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I just need some advice about online dating. I've talking to this guy how's 15 and he lives a state over.We talk on facebook and the phone.He says he really likes and i like him too.So he asked me if i would be his girl friend and i said yes.But now i'm starting to wonder if i should take it like an actual relationship besides the fact i can't see him and vice versa?I really like him and i don't wanna do or say anything to hurt him.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2010): Thank you very much for your opinions.This really hepled me decide.I think when ever i talk to him again i'll ask him and see what he thinks about this.Though i'am kinda of nervous about what he might say,i'll try.
A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (28 November 2010):
Hi there. Although it's fun and nice talking to other young people on the internet, it's really no more than friendship at this stage.
No matter how long you both talk on the internet and speak on the phone, it never takes the place of a real life relationship where you see each other.
For a start you have never seen each other's faces, so can only guess what each other must look like. It's somewhat of a mystery and kind of magical as well.
For it to be called a real relationship, you must be able to meet each other and see each other face to face, at least once or twice a week to really get to know each other properly.
In an internet relationship the things you miss out on are -
- Can't see each other's faces.
- Can't look into each other's eyes.
- Can't hear each other's voices.
- Can't hear each other's laughter.
- Can't hold each other in your arms.
- Can't sit quietly in the same room together, just enjoying being in each other's company.
- Can't go out together and have fun together.
- Can't go out together to nice places, see movies, shows, picnics, nice restaurants.
Just so many, many things. It's very restrictive.
Eventually over time, you will run out of things to talk about and it will become boring. You might even start to argue because one of you doesn't feel like talking much, or one of you doesn't answer the other's message quickly enough. There's so many things that can happen to cause problems.
Also, because it's done in the form of typing messages to each other, there is also some abbreviating done, which leaves room for misunderstandings and taking things out of context. These are very common problems in communicating this way. Many things get misinterpreted, because you can't tell what mood things were said in.
Another reason internet relationships don't work, is because unless it is ever possible to see each other, after a while it will all seem like a big waste of time to both of you. Because you will get to a point where you know it can't go anywhere, so it then becomes decision time. That decision is - "Do we decide to actually meet?" OR "If not, we end it completely."
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A
female
reader, dezuhraeee +, writes (28 November 2010):
alright well i would consider this a real relationship matter of factly you guys talk on the phone if you are both feeling the same way consider asking 'is this a real relationship to you as much as it is to me' even though it may not be but say that wouldnt hurt him righ;o but he is a real boy this might actual be considered a 'long distance relationship' depending on the ammount of liking perhaps loving so basically real boy=real relationship hope this helped
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2010): consider asking him does he take the realationship as serious as you take it even though it is the internet this is basically considered a 'long distance relationship' if you are actually wanting this to work he is a real boy so this is a real relationship depending on what kind relationship so i thumbs up this as a actual relationship
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