A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi I and my husband are getting divorce a "friendly" one! we got help from a mediator,so no lawyer. My husban is a plaintiff which the mediator said it doesnt matter but I felt in some ways she has my husbans's side! close to the court day i goft my financial paper which I should notarize.My income came out negative, vs his high income,because i inculded more expenses which she said is fine because you both agreed on joint custody. He got his finacial early on but they kept mine until few days before court. Now I am worried that maybe it is a trap and he wants to get a custody of my only child. Doe's anyone have any experince in this matter? my income in 36000 per year is it enough to get the joint custody? I agreed to do not get even a penny from him I am just leaving with nothing.Thanks for your help
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2014): Do you mean 'Your childs FATHER (rather than My husband is trying to get custody of MY child) do you mean the childs FATHER is trying to get custody of HIS child AS WELL. After all the word husband does not matter anymore, but the word FATHER does( at least to the child, hopefully ). Am I missing something here? is he NOT the Father,is the child ONLY YOURS ?
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (19 February 2014):
 HE needs to support his child.
Agreeing to no alimony is fine but child support is state mandated in most cases.
Also unless the mother is an active drug user or murderer most courts award custody to her.
IF the mediator approved you not seeking child support get a lawyer... because I had joint custody with my ex back in 1990 and even then he had to pay 600 per month for two children that he saw twice a week, every other weekend and all summer. Yes in the summer CHILD support was reduced by half but I STILL GOT SUPPORT to maintain the home the children lived in most of the time.
DO NOT accept this mediators rules. I am betting HE picked the mediator. GET a lawyer do NOT sign anything.
BTW if you do sign it.. child support can always be amended.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (19 February 2014):
 I think it would be a good idea if you googled 'legal aid' in your state. Or call the courthouse and ask about finding a pro bono attorney. See what legal assistance is provided to those who cannot afford to pay an attorney.
I don't think there are any attorneys or people with knowledge of your states child custody laws here on DearCupid.
Which state are you in?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2014): I want to get divorce in fact. He had the property before we get married so it belong to him and I want to be fair. This mediato infact is a lawyer and gave us some legal advice written agreement is done by her in legal format. I do not have my own lawyer and he doesnt as well . I can not afford it.My only concern is if she was on his side and they put me in spot me in court with giving custody of my child even it is agreed that it should be joint, my asset and income in less but she said as long as you both agreed on joint custody court would not change it but im not sure
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2014): yes we got joint custody I did not want to get any thing from him, and she said because is joint placement and custody I cant get anything. we have an agreement about joint custody which she prepared . everything is equal but his asset is way more and im affraid even we have the agreement is it possible that court give him the custody? my child is 6 years old
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (19 February 2014):
 I would suggest you get a lawyer to help you as your husband might be moving in that direction. Why are you giving up your rights to any child support or right to his assets assuming you are married community of property. If that was agreed when you married why should you settle for less, remember being a single mum comes with its challenges so do start off in the back foot.
I don't believe there is anything such as a friendly divorce and in your case it is friendly because you probably agreed to everything your husband wants. That's nothing friendly.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 February 2014):
 You agreed to no Child support?
If you have all these doubts I'm sorry, I would contact a lawyer. I think having a friendly divorce can CERTAINLY involve LEGAL advice.
How old is the child?
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