A
female
age
41-50,
*aima
writes:how to find out that my husband is still have relation with his own old girlfriend. just today i find my husband private e-mail id and i tryed some of his passwords and luckly i got it right but when i opened his mail id i find that still he is sending mails to his old gf and he is forcing her to see him......i am very disturb but i want to find him red handed so i am now collecting his mails but just i find that he have some other e-mails id which he is using to chat with his old gf. now i have his gf phone number and mail id ..........so should i wait and collect more proofs or just produce him what i have and ask him to explain everything. please help me out friends? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Cindy303  +, writes (4 April 2008):
 I have to go with alot of what Music Man is saying here. It sounds like things are starting to happen with the old girlfriend, but you do run the risk of being wrong. If you think your husband is cheating on you, then sit down adn have a face to face talk with him. I have gotten to the point in life where I think that everything should be talked about in the open. Communication is key. I can only imagine the pain of what your finding out. It must be breaking your heart. Dont jump to conclusions just yet. Talk to him. See what he says. Being upfront sometimes is your best option. Best Wishes, Cindy
A
female
reader, xxcuttie74 +, writes (4 April 2008):
I dont agree with waiting at this point. The unknown will end up blowing things out of portion and eating u alive. U have all the evidence you need. I think you should make him a nice dinner and when he is really enjoying it ask him about everything you found. This will catch him off guard and you will be able to tell by his response. Either way you guys are married and if he hasant cheated on you he is still guilty of being sneaky. Sorry darlin, but I hope this helped u out.
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A
male
reader, Music Man +, writes (4 April 2008):
You run the risk of being wrong, although he seems guilty of something. Usually if a man is being unfaithful or is loosing interest you will notice it in other ways. When you argue does he just dismiss it or does he participate? Is he generous sexually? Is he affectionate (if you were to sit on his lap would he push you off?) Ask yourself a few questions also. Such as, have you changed in anyway, weight, sexual appetite, moods,etc... If you have try talking to him about it and try expressing your feelings that because of these changes your noticing in him and yourself that your worried ha may be pulling away from you. Let him know your willing to whatever you can to put the spice back in your relationship. You may realize your relationship didn't need drama and accusations just a little maintenance.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2008): Wait and see. I am sure your mind is going crazy, but if you confront him now, he will just manipulate you into accepting it. You will wonder if he really stopped contacting her. And wonder, if he did, what would stop him from just taking it up with another woman. It will always be in the back of your mind. Confront him when you are ready to end it. He is an adult and can make his own choices, you decide what you want to live with. Find a girlfriend you trust to spill you guts to for a while. Keep your eyes open. good luck
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