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Is my gf done with me??

Tagged as: Breaking up, Cheating, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (28 June 2008) 3 Answers - (Newest, 28 June 2008)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Ive been with my highschool sweetheart for over 2 years now.

I miss the days when we had sex constantly, sometimes 3 times a day. Now I feel unloved and neglected. we have sex 1 or 2 times a week and it always feels like im pressuring her or like we're only doing it because I want to.

She recently asked for us to be on "a break". and during that "break" she cheated on me, then called me the next morning confessing and crying. I thought the break was fine since I had neglected my friends for awhile but never suspected this.

So... I don't want to be the one to have to work for intamacy because I think I got screwed royally and have stated that I'm giving her a second chance.

She fights so hard to stay with me if i ever mention breaking up but I feel so unloved and ignored. Is she done with me and doesn't know how to say? Am I too horny for my own good? How well Did I handle the break incident?

View related questions: cheated on me, horny, unloved

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A female reader, dandy Lebanon +, writes (28 June 2008):

dandy agony auntokay so i think that your gf is not done with you..but she's done with the sexual thing between you too..maybe she's bored of doing it..

about what you said that you feel unloved,i wanna tell you something,to feel loved you don't have to share bed the one that you love just so you could feel loved..not everything in this life is about sex..in fact sex is nothing,it's just a feeling of satisfaction,that's all..and if you think that you love her for the relations in bed of you tow then i think that for me,i don't consider that you love her at all..because love is not a material thing..

you didn't tried breaking up with her,you've just mentioned the thing,i think that you should break up with her and see her reaction ,and in the mean time you have to know how you really feel about her..and after that let time controle your life..

ok so,first you should try to controle your sexual feelings,and stop pushing her to do such these things if she doesn't want to..second,break up with her and while you'r too far from her sleep with another women and tell her about that the next day and let her know how it really feels like cheating on your friend love..third if you don't love her,just tell her that and don't keep hurting her feelings..

hope that i've response you'r question..

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2008):

Sex always dyes now, it's just the way it is. Maybe you should try new sexual postions? toys, role plays. Something to make it more exciting?

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A female reader, bday121 United States +, writes (28 June 2008):

bday121 agony auntIt sounds like you're placing a lot of blame on yourself. It's NEVER your fault if you're cheated on. It's your gf's fault for not being decent enough to properly end things with you before hopping in bed with someone else. You're not too horny - you're young with a good sex drive. Three times a day is a lot though, and sex levels usually drop as a relationship progresses. 1-2 times a week isn't bad, really, except that your girlfriend doesn't seem to be enjoying it. The real problem I'm seeing is that it's not that she doesn't enjoy sex (obviously since she did it with someone else), it's that she doesn't enjoy sex with you. That's harsh, I know. But I feel like you should realize that.

It's pretty obvious that the two of you have some major underlying issues. Communication is key. Ask your girlfriend some questions - Why has the sex level dropped? Why doesn't she enjoy sex with you anymore? Why can't she TELL you about the problems she's having? Why did she turn to some other man? Just vocalize to her everything you have typed here. Your gf needs to know what's going on in your head, just like you need to know what's going on in hers. It really sounds to me like this relationship can be salvaged with some good communication.

If you try your hardest to save things, and she's just not cooperating, then it's time to end it. A relationship should be fair; she can't expect you to do all the work. Plus, you'll have to find some way to deal with all the emotions you have from her cheating. If you think you can't deal with them, then that's another sign that's it's time to end it.

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