A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I had a fwb with a guy for 18 months. From the beginning he told me it was just for fun. We met up for sex every 4-6 weeks, and we would meet up for coffee once or twice a week too just to keep in touch.Recently I met another guy who has become my boyfriend, so obviously I haven't been seeing the now ex-fwb. However he has tried to make contact, he didnt know I was seeing someone else, so in the messages back to him I was very vague, cause I didnt really know what was going to happen with the new guy.Ex fwb starts making more of an effort by contacting more. Then he sends me a birthday card, which was a surprise as I didnt think he'd remember that. I never mentioned it to him. The card was really sweet, it was an image of a girl with the words "A girl can be two things. Classy and fabulous". So I text him a thank u for the card and then explained why I've not been in touch (new boyfriend). He said hes a lucky guy and we could still meet up as friends.However all along this guy said he was not after a relationship. I asked him if he has found anybody yet and he replied "nobody would have him", so I said 'u mean u won't have anyone'. Then he just said he doesn't know whats good for him.It got me thinking. Is he trying to say something? I really thought all along he didnt see me as a girlfriend, and that was fine by me. He is a great guy, but I never let myself see him as more than a fwb because of how I thought he saw me, now I'm not sure whether he thought more of me, or not.I've just started seeing this other guy, as I said, it's not serious just yet, it's only the beginning. But it's just left me confused with what I want myself.What does it sound like to you guys? Honestly.
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female
reader, Intrigued3000  +, writes (4 July 2014):
 I think it's a case of wanting what you can't have. I agree with Honeypie. He made no effort to become your bf during your FWB time together. Please don't let him mess up what could potentially be a good relationship. Tell him to find someone else to play these head games with.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (4 July 2014):
 Honestly I would cut the contact with the FWB guy and focus on the one you call BF.
Just because the FWB is now "moaning about no one wants him", he could CLEARLY any time in the 18 months have asked you out. HE DIDN'T, and now that you have moved on you are becoming interesting.
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