A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: A friend of mine hooked up with a guy over the summer. (Mostly likely as a rebound as she had just broken up with her boyfriend of a year). They slept together a couple times and then she told him she didn't want anything more from him.At the bar a couple weeks ago, we met up with him again (he's friends with a bunch of her friends). He started talking to me that night, but nothing more happened. Everytime we've seen him since then at the bar, we'll talk a little but that's all.On Saturday at the bar, we talked pretty much the whole night. We went to an afterparty and hung out and talked. The next day, we started texting each other and have been texting or chatting everyday since.We hung out last night and we started making out. I told him it made me uncomfortable b/c of my friend and his response was that he was that since she decided things were over - no question - that she didn't get a say in who he wanted to spend time with. I know this is true but it still makes me feel wierd.He asked if we could hang out again tonight. I like the guy - he's funny, cute, and a cool guy. I'm sure we could hang out and have nothing happen but I don't want to be put in a situation where it could or make her upset with me.I'd hate to ruin either friendship (even though the boy and I are just started ours). What should I do?
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female
reader, ellie:) +, writes (3 November 2009):
Well if I was your friend I wouldn't like it. But that's just me. Take it slow and talk to her about it.. and see if she is really ok with it. Good luck+++ =)
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 November 2009):
You really need to take it slowly with him, to make sure he really does like you and isn't using you to get close to her. Take your time, and make sure you get to know him, and he gets to know you.
As for your other friend, I would suggest that you mention you're talking to him more and looking to move forward with him. See what she says about it, then make a decision.
But in both cases, take your time about it all.
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