A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:After having been alive for 29 years and having been in a few ended relationships, is it foolish and wrong of me to still think and feel that love is the only thing that makes life truly worth living?I was single for more than 5 years between my past relationship and the one that just ended.By the time I started this one, even masturbation was depressing. Sometimes I'd cry because it was just so pointless. And doing things solo? I am independent. I can go camping alone and enjoy it. I can go out to eat alone and not feel like a freak...I was born an only child. But still, after a while things lose their meaning for me when I'm doing them by myself.I don't think it is a matter of not liking myself or needing compliments or affirmations. I feel I'm attracted to openly critical people, so my confidence in one way is actually higher when I'm not in a relationship. Still, even the worst of the most toxic relationships feel worth it when compared to not having anyone around to love.And it isn't completely about sex. I can't have sex with just anyone. I've never had a one night stand, regardless of how insanely horny I've felt. I have, in my life, once had sex way too early with someone I continued dating--and until my feelings built for him, the sex just felt odd and mechanical. Inevitably we grew to know and like eachother more, and by the end, the sex was the best that I've ever had. I can't imagine happily living a life just dedicated to 'self improvement,' career advancement, education, saintly or selfless service to society, etc. I try to be as good as I can (despite being human), but it means so much more when I can care for someone, and be intimate emotionally and physically. Does anyone, who knows what it feels like to have love in their life, not feel this way when they don't have it anymore?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2009): Thank god. i never knew someone could actually be like me. i have two kids but you know what they pay more attention to each other and not me. i am totally alone and seems like no one cares. i miss not having someone to love and take care of for me personally. someone that loves me back. i can be with someone and be totally lost not happy at all.i hope you work things out. please keep posted what happens i need and answer to. thanks for asking that question. you have helped me.
A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (26 May 2009):
 Love is not restricted to the romantic love of a heterosexual couple. It can be a spiritual love, or love for a family member, friend, or pet, or it can be a passion, such as the love of music. It has many forms.
Love is our most fundamental need, and the most powerful thing in the world, but you don't have to be in a relationship to have a meaningful life. Like I said, love is not restricted to relationships.
No one can ever take my music away from me... it makes my life whole and always has.
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A
male
reader, rocknroll +, writes (26 May 2009):
I know when I get down because I don't have someone to love and love me, I get really lonely. I have learned to be my own best friend and do things that I like. It seems the more we like ourselves, the more we beging to venture back out in the world and then we meet someone.
Yes, without love, the world feels empty; things around us seem worthless, a prop to tease us. This can continue, only if you let it.
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A
female
reader, mitta  +, writes (26 May 2009):
I completely agree with you! The only time iv ever felt content being single was for the first few months after I escaped a bad relationship with someone id been with for 4 years. But I soon got tired of going to bed alone and not having that really close connection with someone, like you're one person.
For me love is the meaning of life. Whether its romantic love, or the love of a parent for a child, or even the love for a pet! It just makes everything so much more meaningful and beautiful :)
I like myself as a person, but feel like im better when Im loved and can love back, just because im more happy.
Some people are different and dont feel the need to be in a relationship. But i think they just transfer their passions to something else, but I could never find anything else as satisfying!
So not you're not alone and definitely not wierd... unless we both are!
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