A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Do you think its right that a mother would say to her own child "I will break your legs"?. My mom said this to my little brother who is nearly twenty but still lives at home. Apparently someone approached her and said he was with her daughter buying some pot. Mom said if I find out you were I will break your legs. It wasn't in anger because she keeps saying it. I just think it is wrong to say that to your child.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2012): My my my!!!!!! I would love to hear from you when you have a son that's twenty years old hanging out with his buddies buying pot while living under his mother roof, you should tell your kid brother instead of buying pot, give that money to his mom for rent and food and then she wont have to say things like I'll break your let.
Parents aren't allowed to put their hands on their children so they say things like that to let the child know they're serious, your brother knew his mother wasn't going to break his leg, he thought no more about it but you're losing sleep over it.
My girlfriend told her daughter once, if you do that again I will break your face.
When I was 10 years old I ate all the peanut butter and filled the jar with water, my grandmom told me if I did that again she will knock me all the way into july and that was in december at that time, I knew my grandmom wouldn't hit me but I knew she meant for me not to ever do that again.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2012): If he was a young child then I would say definetly Yes that is wrong but if she's saying it just to blow off some steam and make her point across to a grown boy then well it's still not the nicest thing to say but it's not a crime either.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2012): Well that just goes to show what era we are getting into!
If he is still living under her roof then she has every right to be mad at him for doing drugs you fool!
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male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (2 April 2012):
 That is an inappropriate threat to be making to anyone unless you have the intentions of actually doing it. If she doesn't like the way he is living his life I would think she would threaten to kick him out of the house.
You are right in that it is wrong. It's best not to say things you don't actually mean.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (2 April 2012):
 Hummm does it reflect on my motherhood that when someone yells "Hey Dumb Ass!" my son looks up and says "What?"
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (2 April 2012):
 It's not like he's 4, so there isn't that imbalance of power that causes statements like that to cause an undue amount of fear in a little child.
Some families interact using hyperbole. Statements such as "Come in after curfew again, and I'll ground you until you're 30" or "See that boy again, and I'll take your phone until you're 45" or "Sass me again and I'll slap you silly" even though the parent has never laid a hand on them would fall into that category.
I agree that this was said in desperation and was more about the emotions of the mom than implying actual physical harm. Again, this falls under the whole hyperbole type of communication. Say a son goes off to war. The mom says to him "If you don't come back home alive, I'll kill you!".
It actually implies love for her to say that to him. She cares about him so much that her emotions get the better of her. The only exception to this is if there's the presence of physical or mental or verbal abuse. If she's calling him stupid, useless, worthless, or is slapping him around, that changes everything.
However, if the relationship is usually loving, then such hyperbole threats are actually an expression of love through exasperation and fear for his safety.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2012): He's not a child and yeah of course they say those things.
Here in Ireland for example we say we'll kill people. "Do that again and I'll kill you." "I can't do that she'll kill me."
OP do you think she was really threatening to break his legs? I mean seriously is she going to grab a hammer and smash his legs? If not then there's nothing wrong with her saying that and you shouldn't be so sensitive. She's just trying to make it clear to him how seriously she doesn't want him doing that.
No big deal unless you think the threat is real and she would do it.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (2 April 2012):
 Oh dear… hon I used to tell my kids “behave or I’ll give you a “zetz en kup” (Yiddish for a hit in the head)
I guess she doesn’t know what else to say to him. It’s frustrating if your kid is doing something that you don’t want them to do that is dangerous for them (buying pot is illegal in most parts of the USA)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2012): He's a 20 yr old man, not a child. He's under her roof buying drugs and putting her at legal risk so her figure of speech was very mild...she should have just kicked him out.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2012): It's a figure of speech...the saying has been around since...fowever, just like "I am going to kill you if you say that one more time" ....and your mother is trying to say she does not approve and will be very angry if she finds out this is what he's doing....
the real issue is your kid brother getting involved with pot and doing so while living under the roof of the parents who are providing for him....if he wants to get involved with drugs, tell him to move out and pay his own way and he can do whatever he wants, until then....Mom can "break his legs" to let him know she is against it.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 April 2012):
 People say the darndest things. Maybe she think her threats will deter him from buying pot?
He is 20, so not a child.
But, yea it is an odd thing to say. Pretty sure it was out of desperation.
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