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male
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anonymous
writes: hii'm 17, and i've known this girl who lives down my street for about 4 years now. I've always liked her, but never did anything about it. I thought that maybe getting to know her brother (that is the same age my brother) would help me get closer to the girl, but it didn't really help. But now i've actually done stuff with her, like going out bowling and lazer quest with other friends, and we talk on the computer pretty often. But i tried asking her out to the movies, but she says she is either busy or grounded. I really like her, and i don't know what to do.can anyone help me? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, purrfectionist84 +, writes (9 January 2006):
 Maybe she doesn't realize that you like her as more than a friend. After all, during the four years that you've known her, you've only spent time with her in the presence of others (while hanging out with her brother, going bowling and lazer quest with other friends, etc.). She probably feels that she is a part of your social circle, but has no idea that you're more interested in getting to know her than her brother or the other people that you hang out with together.
My boyfriend and I used to work together. When I first met him, he was always encouraging me to hang out with him and some other people from work. We would talk online, too. Even after we went out alone twice, I thought that he was just interested in being friends, until one day he asked me if I wanted to be his girlfriend! I was confused because, for so long, the emphasis was on "being friends" and "hanging out." Although I suspected that he might have wanted to be more than friends, I really wasn't sure because we were both too shy to express our interests from the beginning.
Try giving her some direct hints that you are interested in her or, if you're feeling confident, just come out and tell her how you feel. Assuming that she doesn't realize you want to be more than friends, then once she does realize it, and if she likes you as well, she will show more interest in going to the movies with you and will make fewer, if any, excuses why she can't go.
If you come out and tell her how you feel, and she still makes excuses, then she probably just isn't interested in you. In the event that this occurs, try not to take it personally, and move on. You'll meet other girls.
Good luck!
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