A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:It all started last yr during september when i started working and i really enjoyed everything from the atmosphere to the people. Slowly i began to fall head over heels for one of my mentors, he was one of the assistants for my boss.Young,charming,handsome,intelligent, hes everything. Only problem is hes older in his mid-twenties and is a one of the head leaders on the job. Many would say its just not right but I cant help the way I feel..i fell not only for his looks but his personality.I interacted with him a few times, when necessary because i would get all nervous and would rather be quiet than say something stupid. Regardless,he would always be around to help me and would look out for me. The year was almost ending but it was too late. I didnt see him and in the summer I found out he got a new girlfriend.This year, things changed and now i work with another set of people. I miss him so much but now he has other newbies to work with. But what hurts the most is that I still see him around the building he acts like he doesnt know me. He ignores me and i still feel something for him. I understand im the one who fell in love with someone who i shouldnt have set my eyes on and i know it would be complicated, probably cost our jobs even. He's a great guy but i dont know if he would feel the same. The fact that im still in school and work under the same place might not look good. It this worth it?
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female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (8 April 2013):
 One more thing: there is quite a difference in your ages, as you are aware.
My final word to you is do the best you possibly can at your studies, and your current job; enjoy your spare time and eventually you'll meet someone who will appreciate you and want to develop a relationship........
A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (8 April 2013):
Sorry to hear you are so disappointed.
A mentor is someone who encourages you in your work, and gives guidance, feedback and support, as necessary. Throw in handsome, and intelligent, and it's not surprising you might well fall for him. He, on the other hand, was basically doing his job as your "cheerleader" you might call it AND he works for your boss.
Given all this, it probably didn't cross his mind to think of you as a potential girlfriend - in any event, office relationships can be a bit dicey when they don't go well - in such a situation you not only have to continue to work together while dealing with something that has become rocky but also pay attention to focusing on the responsibilities and demands of your job.
Added to this is the fact that he has a new girlfriend, and now you are working with others, and he has other mentees.....
I don't know, but is it possible he may have sensed something of your feelings for him and this is why he now keeps his distance?
Its good that you recognize that falling in love with him wasn't a very good idea - one that might possibly cost you your job if things didn't go well.
All in all, this is one of those things to look back on as something you enjoyed at the time, but now need to let go of......
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2013): He sensed your developing a crush on him. That's why he treats you like he doesn't know you. He also has a girlfriend, and you are probably sending out subtle signals you still have a crush by staring or always being close by.
You'll feel better if you just pay attention to doing your job. If he has a girlfriend, NO he does not feel the same.
He doesn't feel anything for you at all. He was a nice guy doing his job. You should be doing yours.
Find another job if you just can't get over seeing him.
He's someone's boyfriend and you're wasting your time trying to figure out how to get him.
You have to grow up now. No more little girl crushes.
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