A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi. I'm hurting and would appreciate a third person's opinion. I've had feelings for a friend for last 2.5 years. They kept getting intense with time but he lives in a different city so I never acted upon my feelings. We used to flirt back and forth and hooked up a couple of times. He knew I'm not into hookups and if I went out of my way for Him, there must be a reason. Everytime he came over to my city, we tried to meet up because I went that extra mile to make it happen. But every time I went to his city, something or the other came up last minute. This is the same guy who travels around the world and is out every weekend but when I show up, he is caught up so bad!! And it's not like I force him to meet up ; he asked me to make time for him because he was way too excited and didn't want me to cancel.So he told.e he would be busy with his cousins but his snap chat said he was out clubbing. When I reacted, it became "the same old story" and his response was "okay I want to clarify no more".Next morning before leaving I asked him to meet again. He kept saying he will ping when he gets free from meeting and made me wait for 4 hrs. I missed my train back. I told him I was stuck because of him and had to stay back. I was in tears. My dog had died and I was stuck in a different city. He didn't even open my Msgs! It's been 3 days. After I got back, I confronted him. He said it was stupid of him to ask his dad to go after the meeting to meet someone and that's why he isn't texting anyone, doesn't want to vent his anger on me unnecessarily.I'm not dumb. I didn't buy this but his tone was very rude and he has been misbehaving. I know he doesn't care. It took me a while to understand but now what do I do? I feel so Humiliated and I'm so heartbroken. I have done a lot for him over these past 2 years. Should I tell him about my feelings and that I'm hurt. But again. What will I get? I want closure. And I want to move on. How? Now what should I do?Ps - this guy isn't opening whatsapp cause of the situation he told me about but has time to come on snap chat and fb. I feel like a fool. Yesterday I typed paragraphs cause he doesn't take calls. His response was a joke! Please help me. Is it possible to tell him everything and Stay friends? Or just cut him out of my life?
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clubbing, cousin, flirt, heartbroken, move on, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (2 February 2017):
 He is not your friend. Believe me he knows already that you have feelings for him, he likes the attention, the chase. But he offers you nothing. How he treats you is cold and cruel. Off course he is opening his messages, he is just not opening yours because he does not want the drama. He will open them when he is bored and wants a bit off attention from you. Do you really want a friend like this? A guy who will treat you like a piece off dirt? Off course you don't cut contact with him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2017): Cut him out! He deserves none of the tears you've shed over him. Block him and next time don't be a doormat for anyone.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2017): Oh sweetie. Hasn't he caused you enough pain? How much more do you want? How much more can you take?Sometimes we must give up on love. Not because we don't love them but because they don't love us.Love yourself more and let him go.He is not worth your time.Everything he did to you (and did not do) is mean and cruel and thoughtless.You are right.He does NOT care about you.Please, for your own sanity, do not contact him again.And grieve his loss. I know your heart hurts and the pain is great now. But someday when you meet the guy who treats you right, you will know you did the right thing.You are not supposed to hurt those you care about. Or ignore them. Or make excuses for how badly you treat them.He has no excuses.He is not that good of a person to do what he has done.He is no friend to you.You don't need people like this in your life.Let him go. Cut him out of your life. You will see he will not try to contact you. And you will have your answer right there. That he never did care. That you were the one carrying the weight of this "relationship." You did all the work. And if it wasn't for you, he would never have gone out of his way to see you. He just wanted a little fun fling. He does not care about you as a person. He does not care about your heart. He only used your body. So sorry. He is not into more than that. He senses that you ARE. He has gone along to be nice, maybe thinking he might get another romp out of it. Or just didn't want to be honest or the bad guy. But his heart just isn't into it. He is not into you.You will be better for it. Stop contacting him. And find ways to keep busy. Honest. You can do it.Hugs.
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