A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am married. My husband and I are part of an open sexual lifestyle. We attend Adult lifestyle parties here and there. I have never made any connection to another man in years. I have just met a man and have been sexual with him 3 times now. I can't even begin to explain the overwhelming energy that is between us from one touch. He can do things to me just with his eyes. He is a very spiritual man and I am enjoying getting to know him on that level as well. My husband is aware of my feelings to a point, but its more than the sex. I feel some strange connection, chemistry with this man I can explain. I can't imagine being married to anyone but my husband, but I feel a strong connection to someone else for the first time ever. What do you guys think is happening to me? Am I falling out of love with my husband? Is it possible to have 2 soul mates? Is it possible to just have a sexual soulmate?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2008): Im in a very similar situation but im a college student in a very long term relationship. I know it feels right with the other person, but some part of me is screaming no, and at the same time i dont even know what the other person really feels or thinks about me. i dont think youre falling out of love with your husband, i am very much in love with my boyfriend and know that in the end there is no one else i would want to marry. I feel like it is almost possible to have two soulmates, but at the same time it feels like something otherworldly, and im not sure that many people in this society, at this time can comprehend it or deal with the complications these kind of relationships can bring. I guess what im saying is, i have no clue what you should do, but for me, im trying to keep the non-boyfriend just a friend, and i just wanted to say theres someone out here in the same boat as you.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2008): I disagree with the previous answers based on the facts that there are many couples trying this lifestyle and if kept discrete and to moderation seems to be working with all parties being satisfied. In my case, sex for me is limited to none, and my wife has experienced a sexual soulmate for several years now with no ill effects in our marriage. We still have love for each other in other ways but sexual satisfaction is obtained with her being with her soulmate. Actually I think of her soulmate more as a Friend in Need.
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A
female
reader, Cateyes +, writes (5 January 2008):
 I personally do not believe we have an actual soulmate in the beginning. I believe when you are married we mold into the person that becomes your "soulmate"....because to me, a soulmate doesn't happen over night it takes time and during that time we discover and learn more and more of our spouse that we love.
It's very hard for me to understand that type of lifestyle. I could never be married to someone where I would share him with other females. First off, his mouth and all other body parts should only be touching and be inside of me...PERIOD! Second, when you are with multiple partners, you are experiencing someone else's "style", their feelings and thoughts, their looks too..can turn you on..for the moment perhaps until you get to know them maybe. My point is, I don't feel you two (you and your husband) really can say you love each other if you want to share each other....and that's it. I don't feel being in a relationship such as that, you can honestly say you do love your spouse, otherwise, you wouldn't be having sex with another person...then why be married? I realize this is not what you wanted to hear, but it's me being honest with myself.
I do hope that the both of you will consider changing your mind in having multiple partners...I know you can practice safe sex, but shit happens too!
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (5 January 2008):
 I think you've opened Pandora's box. I don't understand your lifestyle and probably never will. Adult lifestyle parties. . . that's rich. An excuse to bang whoever floats your boat. Why be married? Soul mates, huh? That's another worn out cliche. Why are you even writing for advice? Do you need permission to screw someone other than your husband? Apparently not.
O.K. Here is your answer: Yes, you have 2 soul mates. One of them is purely sexual, the other is your husband. Now what?
BTW, what is your idea of spiritual? Someone who has a beard like Jesus Christ and a c*ck like John Holmes? LOL.
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A
male
reader, 2old4this +, writes (5 January 2008):
 Hon, I'm sorry but I just don't believe in having that kind of open relationship with anyone. And, thats basically the reason why. People fall in love all the time and each time it is real love. When you get married, you made a consious decision to be with that person only. But, that doesn't mean it's not possible to fall in love with anybody else. Every person is different. To say that you only have a solemate at all I think is kinda dumb. You made a choice. My advice is if you love your husband then you have to erase this other guy from your life all together. Because it is not just sex anymore, it crossed over to being more. Im not saying stop swinging, just stop with this guy.
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