A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:is it ok to date a family friends daughter? my parents, her parents and my step mom where all friends growing up. My dad "got" them in the devorce. We lived togeather for a short time while my dad looked for some where to live. Then I hadn't seen her for a while but now that my dad stepmom and there parents are doing stuff togeather I see her a lot more. I think she has always flirted with me every time we are togeather for the last 3 or so years except when shes had a boyfriend. But she also told her last boyfriend I was like a second brother and thats it, when he seamed jealous after her mom joked about how we are supposted to get married. I'm not sure if she meant it or not. I don't think her parents or my dad would have any issuses with it but I'm not sure and I don't want to trash there relationship if some thing goes wrong. Yesterday while sitting right next to me she texted me "I gotta secret xp" and when I asked what it was she said she cant tells cause its about me. Then a drew mintutes later I started coughing and she said "don't die" I asked her why and she said "I love you" and it got me thinking about her I want to ask her out but I'm not sure its morally right or how to do it I'm 20 and I really suck at relationships. Also she has a brother and she does not hang on him like she does me at all. Same for my sister she rather exclude me from her space then try and squeeze up next to me. Sorry about the wall of text just wanted to get it all down.
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male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (23 December 2012):
 Well it worked out ok for me. Of course, I was much younger (13) and the families weren't so close. And, back then sex wasn't expected by the third date. I just wanted to put in a positive viewpoint.
On the other hand. I don't see anything in her behavior, as reported by you, that says she is interested in that kind of relationship with you.
My general advice to you is: Stop analyzing so much. Start acting. Action speaks of confidence and confidence is attractive.
FA
A
female
reader, bitterblue  +, writes (23 December 2012):
 My opinion is to not go there. Unless you really don't have other choices or the attraction is very insane/intense and mutual. As you say, if something goes wrong, this can jeopardise the friendship between two families - that is maybe a 40-year-old friendship, for all I know.Only one thing strikes me here, the fact that you say "I really suck at relationships". You are 20. You probably meant to say you have little experience but said it backwards. In truth you sound very unconfident. Maybe you would like to elaborate more on this idea and how you came to this conclusion - so we can help with that. I'm sure you are much better than you think. You need to act it too and put it on display. Merchandise not seen and not marketed, guess what - not sold, honey. You're selling yourself a bit short here, I'd like to know why. Not the best way to attract girls.By the way, it speaks very highly of you that you are interested to do what is "morally right", as you say. I don't necessarily see this as a matter of morals, just not something I would advise.On the other hand, I often notice that people who lack experience seem more comfortable "hunting" near home, so to speak. Near their comfort zone. So based on this, I'm not sure you really aim for the person or the comfy feeling derived from the "familiarity" that you share. So I'd encourage you to go out and meet others for a change and to make up your mind. The girl in question can then be a close friend who you can talk about relationships and other subjects that friends like to discuss.Best of luck.
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