A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Work is work, but for me it's more of a day job, because I am a writer. Specifically, I write erotica. I'm not particularly ashamed of it either, all my non-work friends know, and are always asking me for sex advice. Every time a guy friend finds out I like to write it though, watch me roll my eyes, they a little *too* interested in reading it if you get me. I didn't know that writing dirty stories was on par with an OF. Yet every time a man finds out about it, he starts badgering me to let him read it. Which brings us to... I sent one of my platonic male friends a link to one of my stories, and after that he wants to read *all* my erotica, including my new project in progress. Before you go and say, oh OP, he can't be platonic, he has said he's not into relationships and I'm not into one night stands, so we maintain a friendship pretty well, as we have loads in common (although sometimes I find it a bit sus that he could really like all the same things I like, whatever). And we are both single. Anyway, is it normal to talk about sex with your best platonic friend?
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2021): Has it not occurred to you that a lot of guys like the fantasy of finding a hoe, a slut, a sleazy woman who cannot get enough sex and is very broadminded. They think she will be eager to jump into bed with them no holds barred. As soon as guys hear you write such stuff they think goody goody, she is for me.
They get turned on by the stories and imagine the woman is you, and then they prod and sense you out in the hope you are.
Some will totally lose interest in you if they find out that you are not going to put out with them.
I had a friend - she was a very religious, strict, moral woman who was not at all sleazy, but because she lived alone and was very lonely and short of money she worked for a sex chat line. It gave her people to chat to, when it suited her, and it helped pay the bills. One day she made the "big mistake" of telling one of her neighbours about it. As from then he would phone her and try to talk dirty to her on the phone and be disgusted with her when she said no. As far as he was concerned if she did it for strangers - albeit it for money - she should do it for him when it suits him for free.
When it suits people they forget about things like fairness and respect.
A
female
reader, RubyBirtle  +, writes (1 December 2021):
I have a male best friend and we talk about occasionally sex in general terms but we don't really discuss our personal sex lives but I guess we could if we wanted to.
I don't think it's surprising that friends of yours (male or female) want to read your work. I often watch my friends perform or see their art exhibitions etc. It's a way of showing my friends appreciation and support.
But I don't think you should give your friends free copies of your work and I don't think you should let them see work in progress. If you're a professional writer and make your living this way then your friends should access your work the same way everybody else does. I expect to pay to watch my friends perform or see their exhibitions - if everybody expected freebies, they wouldn't make any money.
And never share a work in progress.
Since you write erotica, there will be some people who believe that it reflects your personal life. If any of the friends you share your work with seem to think that, then gently remind them that it's a work of fiction and change the subject.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2021): If you're not shy about writing soft-porn/erotica for strangers to read, why would it be abnormal to discuss your material with a platonic-friend?
If he asks to read your literature; he might be curious as to what's going-on in your head. Remind him that it's fiction, and creative writing; it's drawn from your imagination, and not any suggestion or invitation to be a perv. You may draw from experience or fantasy; but if menfolk get the wrong idea, put them in their places.
Offer your buddies a disclaimer. You are an author, and the stories you write, or the characters in them; are not necessarily a depiction of you as person, or a personal-profile. If they wish to read your work, remember that it's for adults only; not silly adolescent school-boys!
You choose to write stuff that turns people on; maybe people you know reading your work is just one of the pitfalls. It takes quite a graphic imagination to write sensual material! Just like in acting, people can't separate the artist from their characters.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (1 December 2021):
 Sure, why not?
However, it is always up to you to decide which boundaries you want and which you will allow being crossed.
If you are OK with sharing your stories, that is just fine. You could be writing about cooking or art and share it too.
It would be a bit more odd if these were your private diaries or something they wanted to read.
Has the dynamics of your friendship changed since you gave him the link? If not, well I don't see the big deal. People share fan-fic with friends and strangers online every day.
One thing I find suss (as you call it) is that he wants to read the WIP's (work in process) - let's say you get published... He has the WIP. Hard to prove the story was yours, to begin with. Know what I mean saying here?
Share what you WISH to share, and say no when you don't. No is a complete sentence. Remember that :)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2021): There`s no wrong talking sex with a platonic its your job and you hate that part of it?
Just no big deal,its normal! OP
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