A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I have been masterbating for a very long time, i do it evry other day. I was getting really worried because I thought I was the only one in the world who did it. After i do it i get a huge feeling of guilt and shame but it dosn't stop me doing it again. I question myself if im normal and make myself upset about it, i carn't talk about it to anyone because its a very persanol, embarrasing topic. I have developed a slight sense of uncomfortableness around family members, and am having the odd awful nightmare about certain relitives having gay sex. Is there atleat one other person that has had something similar, please help, because I feel like a freak. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Miss Valentine +, writes (22 August 2010):
Masterbation is very normal. Everyone, and I mean everyone does it. Instead of feeling guilty for something that is completely normal you should welcome the feeling and enjoy yourself!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009): You know - I'm turning 16 in a few months. I've been masturbating for about 5 years...hahahaha - I used to think I was a freak. Afterwards I would go to the mirror and scream at myself...but then I began to realise "I'm doing no damage to myself, or others, it feels good, relieves stress...". I began to realize that it was normal. I even began to recognize that lots of other people do it too. That was when I actually accepted that I was normal. The only reason that you haven't got many answers yet is because some people are still shameful of what they're doing - but the fact is is that it's not a bad thing!
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A
female
reader, HonningKanin  +, writes (10 October 2009):
 You know I have been masterbating since I was about 3 years old, from what I can remember and according to my mother there were instances where she caught me at it as young as 2. She actually took me to the doctors for fear I was being molested. The doctor told her that this was very common and normal. Some kids just find themselves really early.
However, even hearing how it was normal from the doctor didn't stop either her, or my family whom are quite religious from making me feel, when ever I was caught, that it was a bad and immoral thing to do. Inturn when ever I did it after I was done I would feel this huge sense of self disgust, guilt and loathing for not being able to be "pure." I felt there was something wrong because I enjoyed it so much. I felt that way for a long time until I realised that this was normal. I was normal, and that masterbating is actually healthy. What was not healthy was the condemnation placed upon me by my family. I steadily learned that their reasons for being so negative towards it were based on their belief, of which I did not share.
Masterbation is does actually has its benefits. It serves as preparation towards being able to tell your partner what feels good, it acts as a stress reliever, it also releases its own set of endorphines which actually act as painkillers and as a sedative. This leads into sex as well to where certain chemicals act as a reward for mating. You do it because it feels good and the reward is chemical stimulation in the brain. As humans it even gets a little more complicated with sex as their are other chemicals (oxytocin and vasopressin) which also insite attachment to their sexual partner. The "chemicals of fidelity" if you will.
What I am trying to point out here, I guess, is that you are a normal healthy girl. There should be no reason for you to feel shame or guilt for something so biologically ingrained as masterbating. Its practically an innate behaviour in all humans because if we were not told it was wrong or left to our own devices, generally the majority of us know how to masterbate without anyone telling us.
I hope this helped a bit.
HonningKanin
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009): You're not a freak! Masturbation is natural, you're exploring yourself and enjoying something that feels good - nothing wrong with that. However, society makes us feel that it's dirty or wrong, which is why people sometimes feel guilty, you're not the only one. I admit, I used to feel guilty at times too. You're not alone.
Just keep going on and enjoying it, you're not hurting anyone or yourself (I hope) so no harm done. Yes, it's very personal to talk about this with people, so I understand not wanting to, but that's why we're here, right? :)
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