A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating my boyfriend for little over a year now, and we both live in different states. He's a really nice guy and he visits regularly, and we always talk on the phone. Recently he just admitted to me that towards the middle of last year, he went on a trip to a different state with his group to do some work for another group. He finally admitted that there was a girl he liked, and he admitted that he did hang out with her and took videos of her even though he told me he never did anything when he came back. He also admitted to me that he went to a party and slow danced with 4 different girls without admitting it to me that night. I asked him if he had ever cheated on his ex (they dated for about 2 years) and he told me no, but when it comes to me he hides things and then tells me later, he's done this three or four times already but he's never done it to his ex. I ended up hating myself after he admitted that to me because I think it's because of me, that I'm not good enough, but I've never cheated on him, nor have I hid anything like he has to me. Is it because of him or is it because of me? Should I continue on believing him when he apologizes and still be with him?
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (21 January 2010):
 If it's the first time is him. If it happens a few times then it's you. Why would you let that to continue? He has committment issues and he has no problems admitting that. There is absolutely no excuse to cheating. A person should always examine what's wrong with the relationship, find solutions, rather than find the easy way out and start another relationship.
He is not a very nice guy. What made you think that?
You two are dating but I don't feel a relationship here. When people are in a contented relationship there is no room to look outside.
He basically apologizes so he can do that again.
If I were you I won't talk to him ever again. No explanations. Just stop.
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