A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Is it bad that I would date someone with HIV if I really cared about them? Am I stupid for this? I am HIV-. Thanks in advance.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI just feel that if I cardd about someone, I could take the proper precautions to be with them. I dont know, I just needed opinions I guess.
A
female
reader, malvern  +, writes (8 October 2013):
 You have many years ahead of you so why invite a massive problem like this into your life? It could have a knock on effect for the rest of your life. You and he may not remain together and you may then find it extremely difficult to meet anybody else if they know your history. You are only young, and what seems like a good idea now, will most certainly not seem like a good idea when you're older and wiser.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (8 October 2013):
my brother has had hep C for over 25 years.
his husband has been HIV positive for over 20 years.
they are now together over ten years and married over three and neither one has shared their own brand of life sentence illness with the other.
as long as you practice safe sex and have good medical care, illnesses a person has do not define them.
when i was younger i used to say "i AM ADHD" now I have learned to say "I HAVE ADHD" I have it but it does not totally define me.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (8 October 2013):
 Safe sex. Manage your herpes. Make sure he's being monitored. You are a human, not the list of the viruses in your life.
Best wishes to you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm not, but my recent ex, his sons mother is HIV+, her viral load is undetectable. He is HIV-. I have herpes. I know it isnt nearly as risky as HIV, but its just a thought I had. Like hey, am I a weirdo because I see them as notmal, and not disgusting animals? Food for thought I guess.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (8 October 2013):
Are you having unprotected sex with this person? Then yes, it's stupid.
Is the person with HIV using IV drugs? That would be a problem.
Is this person under the care of an HIV specialist and is taking meds appropriate to his condition? That would be a good thing to do.
Are you aware of all the risks that having sex with someone who is HIV+ involves? Have you been educated on how to enjoy intimacy without infecting yourself by using safe sex techniques? Are you sober all the time and don't take risks when drunk? Good.
Do you see the points I'm making? If you know you can be responsible and the love interest can as well, well,Then, be safe and enjoy your relationship.
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A
female
reader, Starlights +, writes (8 October 2013):
 As long as you tell your potential partners your health status and be really honest with them I dont think you are stupid. You are entitled to happiness and love too.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (8 October 2013):
Let's just say that if my wife found out she had HIV I wouldn't divorce her. But had she told me early on in our relationship I wouldn't have dated her.
The honest truth is that there is a million women out there (actually 3.5 billion). Why would I chose one (who I'm not yet emotionally attached to) that has a potentially life threatening illness and who I could never enjoy condom-less sex with without exposing myself?
But what you do with your body is totally up to you as long as you're not hurting anyone.
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