A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am a 27 year old guy and have recently found myself in a tricky situation. I really like the sister of my workmate. I have chatted to her a few times, and we had a really great time together at his birthday party. She is drop dead gorgeous and we really connected. However I turns out that she is not 19 years old as she told me, she will only turn 17 in April. I don't fall for anyone that often, I had one serious relationship about 4 years ago and it took me a long time to get over it (she left the country and found someone new).I really find it difficult to forget this girl. I keep telling myself that she is too young for me but I cannot stop thinking about her.What should I do? Is it acceptable for a 27 year old to date a 17 year old? Or should I just forget about her? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2009): Well I think dat you should wait until she's 18... or at least talk to her parents first to see if their comfortable with you dating their daughter since you are 10 years older
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2009): The age of consent in the Uk is 16 years old, after that the teenager can have sex or a relationship with anyone she likes, she dosen't need anyone's permission.However a decent guy would probably get to know her parents and see how they feel. The age gap between 17 and 27 is big, because she is still growing and you are already grown. There are many things that you won't share in common, and there are things that you can do that she can't. The fact that your conscious of her age is very good, she's still a teenager, and sometimes you will find that she acts like a young child. The best solution is for you to try to build a friendship with her first, and see how things go. Teenagers grow and change as they get older, she probably likes you, but your age difference will probably make the relationship hard.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (2 February 2009):
 OK firstly you are in the UK so she is a consenting adult, but saying that, she is still a minor in the eyes of the law.
I think you should consider your workmate in this situation, how would you feel if a 27 year old was sleeping with your 17 year old sister?
I know, I would not take kindly to anyone 10 years older than my sister going out with her. But this guy may be more liberal than me (I have been described as a wookie).
It really does lay strongly on your morals, I think while in our 20's it is still frowned upon to date a girl 10 years younger, where as in your 40-50s it's much more acceptable by society.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (2 February 2009):
 You need to speak to her parents, she is a minor and you will need their permission to date her. How does your friend at work feel about you dating his/her sister?
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A
female
reader, Auntie Stoned +, writes (2 February 2009):
Keep in touch as friend first. Waiting for another one year shouldnt be a problem. Once she is 18, it is nobody's business what you two are doing. :D :D
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2009): I think you're just infatuated with her looks. Do you know what her personality is like? How long have you known her? Did you spend anytime with her? Do you know if she likes you back? All these things you seem to have left out. You are only talking about how much you like her. to me, ten years is alot and where I live, I could get into trouble for dating a 15 year old who's ten years younger than me. Alot can change in ten years and she still has alot of growing up to do and alot of learning. I was a totally different person at 15 than now. I'm just saying to give it time. Maybe wait until she is 18 if you don't want to break the law (if that's the legal age where you live). However, you haven't talked about her personality and if she likes' you, you've only talked about how much you think she's "gorgeous" and all that.
Also, come to think of it, if you're previous relationship ended in her leaving the country and finding new love, that tells me that your relationship wasn't strong enough to begin with. If you're just looking for a sex partner, I'd stay away, unless she wants that. But if you're looking for a more serious thing, then I would suggest maturing up first and not just going at it for the looks. Sure that's the very first thing someone sees in the person, but do you guys really think it will work out? And it's a 50/50 thing? Not just you looking for a young love?
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A
female
reader, kellyxxx +, writes (2 February 2009):
 well i just noticed that you're from the uk, so she's legal to have sex, maybe you would feel better if you wait until she is 18 because then she will be seen as an adult in the eyes of the law. if you like her then voice your feelings. good luck.x
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