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anonymous
writes: Yes. I know this is REALLY immature. But, anyway. I should say, straight up, that my parents are Israeli, I'm American born and raised, and I live in Canada. This guy is Canadian, and his parents are Pakistani. I mention this b/c my Asian friends tell me that this ethnic difference could explain the issue. Anyway, 2x/wk there's a department meeting at the end of the day. At my first meeting, I sat behind this guy who kept on turning around to look at something. I turned around to see what he was looing at. Nothing there. I thought: Maybe it's me? Totally forgot about him until the next meeting. He sat several seats from me, and kept on glancing at me. I thought I'd check to see if I'd imagined this. After, I asked him if he'd understood a certain concept that I didn't get(really, not just to talk). He semed REALLY happy that I'd spoken to him. We left work, talked, and I thought he was v. cute but shy. I continued to believe that he was glancing surreptitiously at me at meetings, but we didn't talk again for a few months. I realized, this time, that he was not shy. At all. Considering how much, I thought, he was looking at me, I couldn't understand why he wouldn't ask me out. I decided I'd imagined he'd been looking at me. Not into me. After that, I could easily talk to him, and so I 1 day asked him after a meeting if I could leave with him. (Not as a sexual overture but as in a person to leave work with.) He said, yes, and I continued to do this after every meeting. After a while, I stopped asking and we'd leave. During that time, I started to truly like him. However, as he wasn't asking me out, I still thought he wasn't into me. Stupidly, I joked, "Man. You're so in love with me." He laughed. But I could swear he was flirting with me: We had this moment of extreme awkwardness where no one was saying anything and I hadn't experienced anything like that since I was 14. So I said, "I feel like I'm 14." He said,laughingly, "This I have to hear." I laughed. He said, also laughing, "You're so weird." I'm skipping parts here but eventually I decided to ask him out. For coffee, and he said, "I can't. I'm hanging out at the library." I was all, "You're going to the libary to hang out?" He said, "No. I'm studying at the library." And then I found out abt the girfriend. I know I've explained myself horribly, but from what I've written, does it seem like he was attracted to me or was I imagining things? Thanks.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2006): Sounds like you read more into it than what really happened. Pakistanis raised in Canada wouldn't really act that differently than most other people raised in Canada, unless they were really conservative, and given that he already had a girlfriend, he's probably not that conservative. Perhaps he was just being friendly and you developed a one-sided crush.
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reader, valleygirl +, writes (30 May 2005):
Well guys are attracted to sexy girls. You must be one. I think he wants to stick with his gf. I'm sure you will get someone new.
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reader, HappyTimeHarry +, writes (29 May 2005):
No telling what was going on in his head, but it seems like he was. Something about you turned his head, because guys normally look at a girl so many times if they think she's hot. I strongly believe he's attracted to you, but he only wants to be friends. He seems emotionally attached to his gf, but he can't stop himself from looking at you. Just a guy's assessment.
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