A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:On Friday my girlfriend, who is about to be 18, told me that she thinks we needed to take a break over the weekend because she wants to make sure she wants to be with me 100%. She told me that she loves being with me and is happy with me, but sometimes when she is by herself she feels like she wants to be alone. She said that doesn't mean she wants to be with anybody else or that she wants to break up, but she just wants to be single at times. Well naturally i was shocked and upset by his because we did have a very close relationship although we have only been together for around 3 months. So after not talking to her for a few hours she called me and we tried talking things over, but it ended up in us actually breaking up. We didn't argue about it. She just felt like that was what she wanted, and i respected her wishes because i really do care about and like this girl. She also tells me how much she likes and cares about me, and she even said that she feels like we could be together forever, but that is what scares her. She doesn't know if she is ready for love at such a young age. Now my problem is yes i THOUGHT we were broke up, but she still has that we are in a relationship on facebook and yesterday her status was about how she was already in a relationship (she wrote this because a guy kept bugging her) On top of all that, she text me at 12:00 last night and talked to me like normal. Stuff like hey, how are you? how was your day? what are you doing? Eventually though she did quit texting me without saying bye or anything, just quit, and i haven't heard from her since. This would be the third day of our break. SO what I'm just wondering, do you think she told me were breaking up Friday night, but intended for it to just be a break. I think she was afraid that if she said a "break" i would stay mad and leave her either way. I seriously am, or was falling in love with this girl. Do you think that she does not want to break up? Does her keeping it facebook official, pointing out that we are together on facebook, and texting me before bed just to stay in touch support the question of she doesnt want to break up?? Please help me!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Mrs. Melone +, writes (18 July 2011):
First, she probably has her eye on someone else and what to leave her options open. On a break with you so she can "test the waters" with some one else, but if that doesn't go well she still has you to go back too. I hate to admit it, but I have done this. Second, you are 18-21, you are young. If I were you I would not be putting so much thought into this. Third, if you are a good guy, there are plenty of girls out there who won't play these kind of mind games with you. Learn Chess it will teach you how to expect the next move and believe it or not this will help with relationships. Finally, calmly say, "I feel like you put me on the back burner and I would like us to try to fix this" if you want this to be fixed. From there you should get the answers you need.
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