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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi guys I'm Tiffany My fiance is Elvin and I love him very much. I have bi-polar disorder,anxiety,and depression. I do not take pills do to no insurance but doing teh best I can to figh the sickness:/....I have been having anxiety lately because I came across in my fiances email account something that made me wonder...Ok well it started off me on my AIM messenger I keep getting these cam girls talking to me trying to get me on their site I know they are Bots I think I have a virus. But after I get that IM I have his yahoo account up and all of a sudden right after the AIM thing I get two girls trying to add my fiance on yahoo....He doesnt even have yahoo messenger....they requested him for yahoo messenger the girls were offline which was odd I asked him and he said he honestly didnt know who they were and said he thinks its bots because I got them right after the AIM incident.My fiance has been fustrated lately because I accuse him of things he says he never did. He says If he wanted to cheat on me he would leave me first not stay and deal with this "bs of mine" he says he loves me too much and if he was an asshole he would of left me. He has been getting very angry about my accusations I feel bad and I know I should stop...but I come up with these scenarios in my mind and start feeling anxiety then I ask him over and over again and he says no he didnt and that he never talked to these girls. Do you guys think he is lying? Or am I paranoid...I know I need Help he has been trying to get me a therapist. I feel lost I wonder if Im just paranoid and that my bi polar is getting worse or if I am right....I need a second opinion. Just hit me with the truth. I also have a history of accusing my bfs of cheating...I have trust issues my mom abused me and I found out last year that my step dad wasnt really my dad all these years,My mom lied and told me he was I found out who my REAL dad was...and my dad doesnt want me:/ he told me he did on teh phone then played mind games....I have trouble believing people and I always investigate to make sure hes not cheating.....I know its immature but most of the time its to calm my thoughts and anxiety.PLEASE HELP ME.
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female
reader, Abella  +, writes (25 November 2011):
 Hi Tiffany,
I do not think your boy friend is lying to you.
And your situation is a classic example of why all countries should have universal health care for all, levied as a tax on income to fund it. So that the most vulnerable and in desperate need of expert urgent medical attention are not left to suffer at home without appropriate expert medical care.
It is very important that you accept that your illness is not your fault. You did not cause it. But you do need urgent specialist medical attention ASAP.
Your proper medical attention by a Doctor is more important than anything else.
And I must pay Homage to xTheAlmightyDuck. Her advice is sound and her anxiety disorders, that she Very Bravely battles, mean that her Advice is sound and worth re-reading out aloud, just to ensure it sinks in.
As far as unwanted mails: I get bogus emails despite a spam filter. I know they are just fake emails - I delete them without reading them.
Please see a specialist Doctor urgently, as nothing is as important as your Good Heath, in your life today.
You need that level of support immediately.
Best Wishes
Abella
bi Polar can present as mild to severe. But it is not an illness as easily treated as a common cold. It is a severely debilitating illness and the sooner you start proper treatment the better. It is NOT an illness that you can treat at home by yourself without expert management by a Doctor.
That your boy friend may or may not
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2011): Well lets do some take charge. You have bi polar disorder.So since your claim is you can't afford it ( really your health and happiness is not worth getting a job and budget for meds?) then you must seek to cut out things that trigger it as well as what homeopathic options might be.YOu can discuss the homeopathic, usually affordable treatments, with a doctor.So no more excuses. YOu want happiness- then take charge and kick some butt!DIET AND TRIGGERS:Time to cut out ALCOHOL. Alcohol chemicially is a depressant which can cause your moods swings to SPIKE.Caffinated foods, desserts like chocolate, Sodas/Pop, Coffee and Tea. They lead to mental fatigue in people with and without bi polarism; just its worse for people of bi polar disease.Up your Fruits, Vegetables, Fish,Chicken and some milk products.Keep a diary to begin mapping out your triggers and patterns of your episodes.Join a local support group, you'll need it.PLEASE SEEK A DOCTOR ASAP and get your Bi Polar disorder under management so you can have a happier, healthier life.
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female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx  +, writes (24 November 2011):
 I am only 14 but like you i have 2 anxcity disorders G.A.D and S.A.D. Which in mordern launguge is Genrilized anxcity disorder (which is anxcity of everday life) and social anxcity disorder (which is anxcity of social situations and people). I also found out a week ago i have a mild form of agraphobia and have a history of depression. I can tell you for a fact that these cam girls are automated bots. As i got them about a year ago on my msn. They send the same message around the clock and sometimes even if you block or delete them they come back. You and your partner need to understand that the accusations and paranoia isn't coming from you. It is coming from your anxcity. I have been having therapy lately with a family friend who used to work in the mental health line of buisness. She has really helped me in so many different ways and she taught me that anxcity isn't a part of you it is basically like a war with your brain. Anxcity cause's your brain to react to the tinyiest little thing and send you into a state of paranoia, for instance i hate people. If I see a person in the street my brain starts to go into a massive melt down and all these things come into my head which makes everything spin round and round. It then puts me off going outside again because i am convinced the people out there want to hurt me or do something to me because of past events my brain goes into panic mode. You need to tell your partner that this isn't you and when you make certain accusations he must'nt get angry with you and just understand it is the bipolar and paranoia speaking. Go to your doctor and ask for therapy, i am tackeling anxcity and i have done okay without medication so if you are dead against medication then there our other ways people can help. Also another thing which might help when you go into panic mode stop what you are doing take long deep breaths and just stop and think to yourself "its just another panic attack, i need to calm down and get my head back on track." then try and find a hobby which takes your mind off things and helps when things get hard. It should be a start x
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female
reader, Miamine +, writes (24 November 2011):
 It's the bi-polar, messing up your head. You know about the bots. You said they wanted to messenger with him, but he doesn't have messenger. If he actually was talking to these girls wouldn't they know they can't contact him this way. You know your head isn't good, and you get very strange ideas. So you got to be careful about how much you trust yourself, you don't always see things clearly.
He isn't lying, you've made a mistake. He's given you his account, because he has nothing to hide. Your guy sounds like he understands, but please be gentle with him. It's not fair for you to call him a liar or doubt him all the time. It's not easy to be with someone who has bi-polar, if he's with you and try's to treat you right, he is one of the good guys.
You really need to see a good doctor, any way you can. Bi-polar, anxiety and depression are not things you can just leave, or will get better without some type of medical help. Don't they have any free doctors where you are?
As my doctor once said, "aren't you tired, having to fight this illness all by yourself".. If your diagnosis is correct, pills will definitely make a big difference.
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (24 November 2011):
 I think he's telling you the truth- I got requests myself for Yahoo messenger from Brittany This and Tiffany That,- I think it's bots, but whatever it is, sure nobody that I know or that I have gone looking for !
Said that, you sound seriously, seriously in bad shape, and you need to get specialized help ASAP. Call your local hospital or University, enquire about free clinics or sliding scale fee professionals or help lines or any other possible low cost solution for support and therapy, get creative, rack your brains, you and the bf, but just do it !
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reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (24 November 2011):
 You need to go to a therapist. Your past has left you messed up and unable to trust people. If you don't get help now you will lose your boyfriend, because there is only so much a person can take before the get up and leave. I believe that you are just insecure and paranoid. I don't believe that he is cheating. So I think you need to sort your issues out and go and get help and soon or else you will never be able to trust anyone and you will end up living a very lonely life. You need to get more confidence and believe in yourself more. You need to get out and about with friends and enjoy life. Take all your focuses of your boyfriend, and also let him out with his mates. Show him that you can trust him and give him a break. A relationship is not meant to be this draining. He will eventually leave no matter how much he loves you because it is draining him being accused all of the time. Sometimes we do not realise what we have until we have lost it. So get to that therapist before it is to late and hopefully they can help.
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