A
female
age
51-59,
*onfused118
writes:I have been in a relationship for the last year and a half, when we first starting seeing each other he was still married, although he was working away from home, since then he and his wife are getting a divorce. We get along well most of the time, and for the most part I am happy with him, but he is constantly searching for a new job, most of which would be in another state or in another country, when I ask him about plans for the future, he can never give me a direct answer, his answers generally tend to be I love you and it would only be for a year, and you can come to visit me or take a job where ever I go and be with me...however, for the most part I feel as though this is his way of excaping from commitment, what should I do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Reebe  +, writes (27 March 2007):
 The Phrase "if you love someone let them go" comes to mind now. I don't mean forever but maybe your guy needs to discover somethings about himself, maybe he needs a little bit of freedom before he settles into a long term commitment. I doubt this has anything to do with not wantong to be with you.
If you want to be with this guy long term I would sit him down and say that you want to be with him and you understand his need for some space and that you care about him deeply and want him to be happy (as I assume you do)
But also say if he goes you can not guarantee you will still be there when/if he gets back. That way he may realise how much he maybe giving up by leaving.
Hope this helps - Good Luck!
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