A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello people, 2days ago I went on date with a man I met online his 44 years old with 4 kids from his partner who left him for another man.We chatted in a Cafe for 3 hours, but what was strange was that he was telling me all his faults like how he wastes money and putting me in his plans example wanting me to visit his cousin priest, and how he wants me to mother his 4 kids from a previous relationship.And asking me to visit him at home. He was also touching my hands telling me how he loses interests quickly in women, but that he really needs a woman in his life and wants me to take the drivers seat in the relationship . So my question is should I visit him at home, and is he desperate or just weird for putting plans on someone he barely knows? I have liked him, but I just want understand his mind.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, femmenoir  +, writes (22 February 2018):
 He sounds quite irresponsible, flighty and desperate to find a replacement "mother" to his 4 children.
He even touched your hands, yet you hardly know him and he even admitted to you, that he "quickly" loses interest in women, so please see/take this as a real red flag!
You will surely be his next "temporary victim", if you are so naive as to continue seeing him and allowing him to be a part of your life and to take advantage of you.
YOU must take control here and do what's best for YOU and from where i sit, i don't think this guy is good, stable, reliable and positive long term dating material.
It's time to say goodbye and move on.
You'll be happy that you did, trust me!
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (21 February 2018):
 Sounds like he is more desperate for a "replacement mommy" than a partner. He has 4 kids and a house that needs minding or a "woman's touch" (in lack of a better term).
He seems flighty and honestly? FULL of empty promises.
The fact that he is TELLING you what to do and you BARELY know him, it's just off-putting.
Are you really ready for a partner with ALL that baggage?
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