A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i am 3 and half months pregnant and i have noticed that my boyfriend hasnt really wanted to have much to do with me anymore. he says it is my fault he is pulling away. is it really me that he is trying to leave? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (26 October 2009):
Soemtimes when a male realizes he is about to become a Dad, he can become very panicked. You're bearing the brunt at the moment, there's no doubt about that. But men can feel very overwhelmed by what is happening. 4 months ago, it was you and him and you didn't have a care in the world. Now, there's you, him and a baby and it's all changed in 3 months because now he's got responsibilty. He's probably scared, and isn't sure of to deal with it. Also, he may not completely understand what is happening to you. Though he knows you're pregnant, he may have no idea how to help you, or how to support you, so he's pulling away because it makes him feel safer. I think you need to sit him down and really talk to him, which won't be easy, but can be done if you're gentle and understanding. Ask him what it is that's driving him away. Explain to him that you need him and that your baby with him. Soemtimes men need to feel needed. It's our way of being reassured taht we're actually useful. Try not to be stressed as well, because your baby will also feel your stressed. Sit him down and talk to him. Take your time and listen, then tell him how you feel. Hopefully he'll listen to you too.
|
