A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hello there,My co-worker and I were very good friends at work. We had never gone out together, I felt some subtle hints from him. Then we got into major conflicts, he came by to apologize afterward. After that, I backed off and just be another typical coworker and tried to minimize the interactions to avoid any additional conflicts. Recently, he started to be more friendlier and winked at me. At least work, he's not a winker type, more like arrogant type of guy. He winked at me after saying good bye which had never happened before. Is he trying to convey something?
View related questions:
at work, co-worker Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (23 February 2017):
 I think he is just trying to be friendly and make you feel comfortable around him again. Try not read to much in to it. Unless off course you like him, in that case ask him out! But I would advise against dating co-workers, it could get messy!
A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (18 February 2017):
 I agree that it's probably just saying "all's good now", but remember the saying "don't sh*t where you eat", i/e keep it professional at work.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2017): Don't read too much into it. Just keep a comfortable professional-distance and that keeps things where they should be. I think he was offering you an olive branch.
Nowadays people bring too much of their personal-lives and unprofessional behavior into the workplace. As a boss, we have attempted to offer people a relaxed and stress-free atmosphere. The payback was very poor behavior. It became unstructured, and people were not polite to each other. They were like a bunch of unruly kinder-gardeners. So we started having seminars to show everyone (mangers included) how to treat each other; and reminded them what type of conduct is acceptable at the workplace. Stuff adults should already know! These are highly educated and intelligent people!
It's okay to disagree, it's fine to make friends, but it is best to do it all with professionalism and dignity. When you're on the clock, you're on paid-time. So let him wink until his eyeballs fall-out. Just ignore him and interact with him only when your work assignment requires you to.
You should be cordial and polite at all times. If you have issues you cannot resolve on the spot, seek a supervisor or take it to Human Resources. Most things are petty and can be handled with simple diplomacy or humor.
If his winking offends you, simply ask him: " Please don't do that, I'm not sure what you mean by it! Thank you!" I don't think he meant anything bad by it.
...............................
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (18 February 2017):
 Maybe it's just me but I would be very put off by someone who winks at me.
He's probably implying that all is well between both of you as far as he's concerned... And perhaps he's even open to rekindling the friendship.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 February 2017):
 He is trying to show you that all is forgotten and good with you two, I think.
And I think you did WISELY in deciding to keep it professional and polite.
He might have other ideas or he wants the "friendship banter" you two had before the conflict back.
Keep it to JUST being coworkers.
...............................
|
