A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I am 35 years old and have no children. I have known my male friend who is 45 for 6 years. At the time we met I was in a serious relationship with someone so we kept alot of our more than friend feelings on the back burner. Towards the end of my 7 years relationship with my boyfriend, my friend and I lost touch (I think are feelings for each other were really getting in the way of just being friends). This New Years I decided I was tired of wondering how he was so I picked up the phone and called him. Since then we have been talking and seeing each other on and off. Nothing intimate has happen between us but my heart skip a beat when he looks at me that way and when he accidently brushes up against me. The problem we have is that we are both so stubborn though and this has gotten in the way of making this relationship go to the next level. Now, I am moving about two hours away which has put another strain on this relationship. Can a relationship work with two stubborn people, and if so how?Also, I can not physically have children since I was 30 years of age. He know this. We both also know he really wants children and has none. Can we really have an intimate/serious relationship knowing that I can not give him what he really desires?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2008): I think you need some courage and just say how you feel - I doubt either of you want to make a fool of yourself but its obvious there is a connection. Try and imagine the worst case scenario - he laughs in your face, tells you he would never fancy you in a million years and says get lost I don't want to see you ever again. Now realise that a) that is unlikley and b) it would at least be an answer which is better than hanging on a cliff edge like this for the rest of your life. Showing someone up for being stubborn is a much better way of overcoming your feelings about it - so maybe you need to make the first move.
A
male
reader, Paladin +, writes (13 March 2008):
Yes the relationship can work and the 2 hr distance isn't much an issue either. The issue of children will only be a concern if he truly doesn't love you. After all isn't this what its all about. First you both should have unconditional love for each other. There are many relationships where the couple finds out after the marriage they can't have children and they do fine because they truly love each other. If your not being able to have his baby is a deal breaker then your better off without him. As far as being stubborn that's no big deal. You may have some wild arguments but then again makeup sex can be great. I think you already know your going to have to move a little slowly here and have some intimate conversations to fully undertand how each of you feel but I believe you have every bit of chance of working this out as any other couple. Best of luck.
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