A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I started dating about eight months ago. He ended a 4-year relationship last spring. He moved to our area about 3-4 months after ending his last relationship, but last week when I was looking for a paper in his desk, I came across a picture of he and his ex sleeping or napping and cuddling in bed, and she was wearing his shirt. Previously I found two pairs of her old sweatpants in his drawer, but he claimed to just use them for old pants - that they had nothing to do with her. My question is: Is he over her or hanging on? Is he still thinking about her? He recently told me he loved me, and I believe him - I love him as well. He is quite mature and doesn't date around.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2007): Don't worry about it. Most people have pictures somewhere of people from their pasts: ex-best friends, childhood pets, and yes, ex-lovers. They spent four years together so it's normal that she has left traces of herself in his life. It sounds as though he's moved on. You've been together eight months now, and if it had been a rebound thing it probably wouldn't have gotten that far. Don't stress!
(How did they get a photo of themselves asleep??)
A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (15 May 2007):
Don't you keep pictures of you and your exes? I know I do, even though I haven't thought about most of them in ages before I answered your post. I really wouldn't worry about this. It's natural to feel insecure about those who have gone before us but the important thing to remember is that they have GONE before us. The guy is still here and he's with us.
CD
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