A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i lost contact with an old high school friend, and earlier this year he found me on facebook and started to message me, we talked for a bit and eventually exchanged phone numbers and started to text each other everyday all day. he then asked me out on a date and we went out to dinner, and then again to his house and we cooked dinner and watched a movie. we added sex into the equation after about the 5th date. but we have never had the "are we fwb or do you want me as a gf" talk. we still text and talk to each other everyday and he invites me over to his house at least 3-4 times a week and not every time im over we have sex, we just hang out.he has invited me out with his friends as well as family and would do bf things (like pay for my drinks, put his arm around my waist, and i never once saw him flirting with other women).but earlier in our 'relationship' he admitted to sleeping with an ex of his, but seemed very appologetic. and i couldnt be too mad because it was when we first started talking.but after that he has stayed loyal to me.i feel like he has really opened up with me about himself, he recently told me about his battle with depression. so im hoping that he sees me as a gf, or that i am gf material. but im worried that he is just playing me like a fiddle. i would greatly appreciate some advice, thanks!
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionits funny actually because last night i stayed over his house and as we were about to go to sleep he asked me to be his girlfriend! lol he was adorable about it. he said that he wanted to ask me for awhile now but was to shy to bring it up : ]
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2011): I would just ask him. It may feel awkward to do so but he's also taken risks and told you about his depression. He may just assume you know you are together because most guys know girls want a relationship if there is sex involved.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (23 September 2011):
 How long have you two been seeing each other?
You can't hold him sleeping with his ex against him because you two aren't together. I give him props for being honest with you about it..but I also question if he's over her or not. Sometimes we fall back into those old feelings with our ex when we're having "casual sex" with them.
I don't believe he's playing you like a fiddle, because he would have already dropped you after the 5th date. Let alone introduce you to his friends and family.
I believe it's time to approach the topic of defining what exactly is it you guys have. Do it face to face, and ask him where do you guys stand. Are you boyfriend/girlfriend, FWBs, what? See what he says.
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