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female
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anonymous
writes: Hiya, I have been with my boyfriend for 3 months now. It's my 1st relationship in some time and I really like him, however, maybe im a bit paranoid but recently he has been acting differently. He will only say I love you if I say I love you to him first, has become very quiet around me and conversation dries up fast even with me making a huge effort to keep it going. He also got in a huge stress when I went running with a good male friend of mine I have known for a long time (we would never see eachother as anymore than friends) Whenever I ask my boyfriend if he is ok he says he is fine but I know something isn't right and he just won't tell me. I Am worried he has plans to dump me or something and is just letting me linger. Is this normal guy behaviour or am I just being paranoid? xxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2006): I don't think it necessarily means he's seeing someone else.
You do need to sit down and talk with him, in a gentle, not accusing, not coming across as needy, way to ask if there is anything he wants to talk about.
You see, three months is not very long. You are both still in the getting-to-know-you stage. You are finding out how you get on together, what common values/goals/interests you have, and how you both deal with difficulties that come up. It is POSSIBLE that he is questioning in his own mind whether you are compatible together.
If it turns out that he does think you're not well-suited to one another, you'll have to accept it. Yes, it would hurt. But, better to find it out early on, rather than continue dating for months on end, and then have it crash. Don't want to alarm you: it could simply be that he's feeling a little jealous of your running buddy.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, bonym  +, writes (17 August 2006):
 I have to agree with snowbird, I am not entirley convinced that he is cheating nor would I be so quick to suggest that he is seeing as I dont know all the facts. Its sounds like such an obvious answer, but sit down together and tell each other how you feel. You need to relay your feelings to him and being open about how you feel and let him know what you want from the relationship and how you will take things from here. Good luck. xXx
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A
female
reader, snowbird  +, writes (17 August 2006):
 I certainly disagree with the male respondee who had the knee-jerk reaction that he is cheating on you!! What was THAT all about!!!
More likely that he is jealous of the guy you go running with, why don't you ask him? Easy solution would be to get together with several friends to go running with, if your guy won't join you.
This is the exactly the same kind of reaction I used to get from my ex whenever he got jealous. Moody, and he wouldn't get to the point of what was bothering him, for fear of opening a 'pandora's box'!
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A
female
reader, pica +, writes (17 August 2006):
You might want to cool off the relationship monitoring - I don't want that to sound harsh but instead of worrying about how things are, have fun instead. Think of things for the two of you to do that that you will both enjoy and take you mind of 'how it is today'. He hasn't dumped you so don't keep worrying about that - make the relationship good for both of you instead. Good luck, and enjoy yourselves ;)
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A
female
reader, in turmoil +, writes (17 August 2006):
hi, obviously everything is not fine, maybe he is a bit depressed at work it may not be your relationship. But I do agree that you should sit him down and find out.Maybe spend some time doing what you mutually have in commen and ask his friends if they know what might be troubling him.If it is indeed that he is jealous about your running partner then maybe ask him to run with you instead for awhile, after all you have been dating for such a short while, you really havn't had a great deal of time to get to know each other properly. You should be in the honeymoon period right about now. If he doesn't perk up maybe you should think about moving on.Best of luck to you both.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2006): He is cheating on you, dump him and find someone better!
Thats 98.67% of the time, so it could be different, but either way u deserve sum1 who is HONEST and LOYAL to you and also sum1 who RESPECTS you, this guy obviously doesnt.
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