A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i just started dating a friend of mine and it was great how we really liked each other and got together =) but everything seems to suddenly have changed. He's my friend and he knows how i've felt about things moving really quickly in past relationships... but he's already doing things like making me meet his family and friends at official occassions as a "couple"- and we've barely had 3 dates!! He also keeps planning stuff for our future and talking about what "we" will do in 10 months time etc etc. It's wierd how he went from this great funny interesting guy to being super clingy =( I've tried to tell him that this makes me uncomfortable but he doesn't seem to understand - it's like he thinks we've jumped right into the middle of a serious longterm relationship and I think we've just started dating. I'm not sure if anyone is going to understand where i'm coming from here... but it's putting all this pressure onto the relationship that doesn't need to be there... I honestly don't want this to end badly between us and I want it to work out.. any advice would be welcome?? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008): You both need to sit down and you need to spell out to him that at this point he is suffocating the relationship. And that you are not comfortable with his Me, Me,Meism within the new relationship. It does appear to me that you have hooked-up with a Controller,and if you let him get away with it,his Control will only get worse,and worse. And that relationship will become an emotional Hell on earth for the both of you.
A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (3 January 2008):
 I can quite see where you are coming from here, you have only had three dates and he is acting like you have been together two years. I really think communication is the key here, i know you have said this makes you uncomfortable to him, but i feel you have really got to lay it down here. Be stern and tell him you are really not happy with this relationship progressing at such a fast rate and it needs to slow down. Tell him you really like him, but that he is just putting to much pressure on things. Say you really do want this to work out, but at a much slower pace.
Hope it goes well x
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