A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met my boyfriend online and we've been dating for a year now. When we first met, he used to tell me how he wanted to leave his country and move somewhere else to be with the one he loved and he used to tell me that he's going to move to my country. But then it changed when I got fired from my workplace. He offered me to come to him and get a good job there with better money. But the problem is, my parents are completely against this. They said I shouldn't just listen to him, and fly meet him in to aplace I've never been at. I know they're being concerned but I also want to meet him!! I ask him to come instead, but he said, he couldn't, because he doesn't have as much money to fly over here and then bring me home with him. Plus he also said, it'll be way cheaper for him to pay for my ticket for a one way trip there. I know there are also times he tries to control me, like, he doesn't want seeing me talk to other guy like my old friends, even when I hang up with my girls, he felt abandoned. He probably is being insecure due to the distance between us, but I really love him and I just got a job with the government that forced me to stay here in my country. Last night I talked to him and tell him that I just can't go against my parents but I do really love him, then here comes his statement telling me that eventually he should move on. What does it mean? Is he giving up on me? I know I sound desperate because I love this guy and I still hope that one day I'll be able visiting him but it seems now he can't do this anymore and wanting to move on. What should I do? If Are there things I can do to show him that I love him and want him to keep this relationship works?? Thank you very much.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2011): It sounds like you are being manipulated. If he were wanting to be with you he would meet your parents and do the right thing.
He wants to make no sacrifices and probably has many ladies he is after online from the sounds of it.
I don't think in many cases parents know best but in this one they have good reason to be against him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2011): I don't think he is giving up on you persay, I just think he trying another approach to getting you to visit him. I think it's great that you both maintained a long distance relationship for so long, but I don't think you truly know your feelings for someone unless you actually spend time with them in person and I think he wants to actually move forward with your relationship, but he feels he can't unless you spend time together in person. So I think maybe you should try going there for a couple weeks and see if the chemistry is the same, and then start planning to move with him if it is.
hope this helps
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