A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:i have been flirting with this guy now for about 3 months however i don't know if i should take things further or not.Ok he works in the bar im a local at and i see him every weekend. The first time i seen him he just kept staring at me then gradually as the weeks went by we started to talk to each other - this was about a year ago but 3 months ago i gave him my number, after he asked for it so many times.That night i gave him my number he asked me back to his house but i said no. I know a girl that knows him quite well and she said that he's just out of a relationship but lately he's been kind of sleeping around. So that kind of put me off a bit, i basically told him that i really wasn't into one night stands and he told me that he wasn't looking for a one night stand with me. But i still didnt go back to his. Now we've been texting for ages now and i'm beginning to really like him. He shows that he really likes me too but im scared to go back to his house with him incase he just uses me. I couldn't deal with it at the minute, in the back of my mind i think that he's just flirting with me to get me into bed and once that happens he's gonna kick me to the kerb like the rest of the girls. Maybe i'm just being paranoid as other men have used me in the past but what should i do?
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female
reader, Lexie88  +, writes (24 November 2009):
 Well, what do you want? Do you want a relationship from this guy?
Don't go to his place, expect a proper date. If all he wants is to hang out at his place then you know he's not worth the effort.
You say 'in the back of my mind i think that he's just flirting with me to get me into bed and once that happens he's gonna kick me to the kerb like the rest of the girls.'
Why do you say 'ONCE THAT HAPPENS.' Why does it have to happen? Why can't you go on a date with him and see where things stand? You make it sound like you have to sleep with him.
If you already think he only wants to use you, your gut feeling could be correct. But to save yourself wondering what if, try and arrange a date with him, don't sleep with him and see if he wants to pursue something. If not, you'll know what he wanted all along.
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