A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey,I've Just Started Seeing This Boy And We Spent Some Time Together On A School Trip. Now We're Back At School We See Eachother At Break And Dinner. Well Anyway The Problem Is I've Asked Him If He's Wanted To Go To The Cinema 2 Weekends In A Row And He's Said He's At His Nans Or On Holiday, Is He Blowing Me Off Or Generally Busy?
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female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (18 July 2007):
 Hmmm it's hard to say but what I would say to you is that if a boy really likes you, usually he will do all the asking out. Boys of his age do tend to be a little slow or shy to approach girls, but they might talk about who they fancy to their friends, hence the famous 'My mate fancies you' line.
Talk to his friends to see if you can establish if he likes you. He may, of course, just not be ready to date girls. Some boys are late developers, but if you absolutely are determined to hang with him, maybe arrange for a few of your mates and a few of his mates to go to the cinema and just see if he tags along. (A lot of youngsters arnt ready for the one on one thing)
Give him space and dont chase!! thats my motto...and if he DOES have feelings for you, eventually he will be ready to let you know, if he DOESN'T...well just accept that its not a match and move on.
Good Luck
Aunty Em x
A
male
reader, Undisclosed  +, writes (18 July 2007):
 Reading signs is never easy and all the more difficult when emotions are on the line making it hard to see things clearly as you run the risk of being overly pessimistic or optimistic. While both scenarios are possible, try to take all the details into consideration without letting your heart waver back and forth between one possibility and the other.If the boy is genuinely busy he may have:- suggested a more convenient time- expressed how he has had to turn down other commitments as well- expressed regret that the two of you could not meet on Saturday- gone on at length about his upcoming visit to nan’s or holiday; giving details so that it would not simply sound like a brief excuseIf the boy is unfortunately not interested he may have:- been brief and evaded the subject when you brought it up- avoided eye contact- the other commitments might have sounded hastily draw up- kept conversation at a minimum- not shown interest in meeting up or doing a similar activityI hate to introduce another possibility but it’s a very valid one. Boys are insecure. This is inescapable simply because there are a lot of things they either do not know, have not done or are scare of risking. When that’s the case, signals get mixed up and you start seeing yes and nos at the same time.“Yes” I am interested but I am “not” interested in you seeing behind my confident exterior; realizing that I don’t exactly know what to do when it’s just the two of us; seeing me act differently because emotions are on the line and I’m now more conscious of my actions than I was before.If you’re looking to escalate things, read his interest more than his actions (that means listening to his suggestions about meeting up, him trying to look good in front of you, him taking an interest in you, eye contact, physical contact…hand on the forearm or shoulder etc…) ABOVE ALL: Enjoy ever rung on the ladder. It does not have to get good at the next step of ladder of the one after that. It’s good now. Enjoy it now for what it is. You are enjoying each other’s company at your current level and this is already special in and of itself. If things escalate, great. If they don’t, try to make this a positive memory that you can file away. I mean you guys are having fun.
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