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female
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anonymous
writes: hi this may seem silly but it hurts me. the thing is my friends invite me and my bf out everytime they are going out and when i ask my bf if he wants to go out he always makes up an excuse like on sat there. my friends had arranged to go for a night out and asked me n my bf to go and when i asked him he said maube then 2hours later he said he wasnt feeling well but then his sister phoned and asked if we wanted to go play pool and he said yeah. we got into an arguement as i thought he was being selfish as my friends had first. when i asked if he had a problem with my freinds he said no he just didnt want to go. we ended up staying in that night but he hardly spoke to me. i asked him the following morning why he had hardly spoke to me the night befor ehe said that it was because he wanted to go play pool. is he being selfish or am i just being silly? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (31 October 2006):
 I agree with Dr but I think that spending a night with your friends would help the relationship and his understanding of your personality thoug to ask him to go with them many times if he doesn't feel like it wouldn't be nice but selfish on your side
A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (31 October 2006):
 There could be all sorts of reasons why he avoids your friends and he may not tell you if he dislikes them. Personally I don't like some of my husband's friends and opt out of nights out when they are going to be around. However, he knows how I feel so he has 'excuses' at the ready when they invite us out. I think it doesn't have to be a bad thing - it is nice for each half of a couple to see other people socially outside the relationship and without the other person being around.
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