A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been dating my boyfriend for 7 months before I moved back home 2 months ago.. and my home is thousands miles away from his.. We both still have one more year of study back home.We are each other first serious partner (I'm 22 and he's 24), though we're unsure if we are the ONE for each other in the future, right now, I love him and I know he loves me a lot too and both of us do not want to date any other people. But the thing is, we both are still quite young and inexperienced in serious relationship, we don't really want to make any important promises to each other. Though we do have some rough plans about moving geographically closer, it's not something that we're putting our main focus on nor we're working hard towards it. I'm not sure if we are only wasting each other time as we don't have a concrete plan about OUR future.. or is that most LDR couples start out like us and find their way to be together some time later? We love each other a lot and I know it'll be hard for us to just cut each other away for lives. (Actually before we planned to stop contact and not try LDR, but we couldn't) But if we are just heading to a way that there's no future and we'll just end up resenting each other or bored of each other, I'd rather stop it now..Please give me some advices, thanks :) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (11 October 2010):
 Sounds like neither of you are cut out for a LDR. You have met this guy in person, right?? 7 months is still a little early to talk about any future plans...you need to discuss what you to want in your life, i.e. you both want marriage and children after you graduate. However, if you are both doubting this relationship due to the distance then this relationship isn't going to work. LDRs are hard work and require a lot of communication daily on top of the basic maintenance of a relationship. To answer your question, yes eventually one will have to give and move to be with the other.
I really think it's best for you two to split since there is so much hesitation. However, if you don't agree then you have already made a rough draft of plans but remember life happens and a lot can change in time, so just see how things go between you two.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2010): Im am in the same situatuion as you, although im only 100 miles away from my boyfriend. we have recently split but are both still talking to each other. we love each other so much its crazy i really want it to work out. I know that it is tough and stresssfull but why not give it a shot if you love him, and then later make comprimises or discuss one of you moving to be closer to the other. hope this helps!!
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