A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: HiI am dating a guy 6 years younger to me for the past 2 months. At first i was reluctant and he was the one keep on insisting and then we went for a date and it went well and we started seeing each other.Suddenly 2 days back he started saying like he wanted a break and he feels like he has changed a lot and he doesnt like himself anymore. I seriously dont understand this, we felt connected and suddenly he is backing off.I dont want to beg or anything, so i said i wont call him or text him and left. He never contacted me after that. Can someone please explain why exactly he broke up.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2011): I dated a guy for 3 yrs and 3 months. He was 6 yrs younger than me too. We met at 17-23. Now we are 21/27 and over for 2 months. We have had some amazing times and some terrible times with a few break up's in the mix.
I guess I always thought there would be age issues due to his youngness, but I see guys who do commit at that age, and think that if they think you are worth it, that they will stick around and not give into peer pressure.
I am gutted right now. I just found out that my ex is wanting to attend a cougar party this weekend. And these women - NOT ATTRACTIVE. He wanted out of our relationship because he didn't want to be a 'we' - I feel sick that he threw us away to experience.... that. I also thought "Oh he's young" - but I am tired of giving the age excuse. There are decent young guys and I would not let this experience make me feel like not giving another younger guy a chance. Perhaps not so young, but I would not rule out younger. There is no one answer and only he has it. If you think it will make you feel better to get an answer why, ask him (without pressuring him to fix it and make up!) Get the answer (although in my experience chances are the answer will be some pathetic lie) and try to get over it. That is all you can do. I have had everything said to be over this break up but in the end it will take time. All the best...
A
male
reader, doublejack +, writes (22 June 2011):
I agree with SVC. I think the biggest issue is that he's quite young. Doing the math, he's in the 20-23 year old bracket. At that age, and being a guy, it is not surprising if he wasn't looking for a serious relationship.
It's also possible that he was just in it for the sex, and having conquered he's on to the next girl.
Only he knows what his motivation is / was, and whether he's still interested or not. It has only been 2 days, so perhaps if you give him some time to sort out his mind he'll end up contacting you... but it is just as possible that this was his way of breaking up, for whatever reason.
You only dated him for a couple of months, so maybe the best thing to do is move on. A LTR with this guy could be rocky just because he's got some maturing to do.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (22 June 2011):
Sadly NO one but the man that broke up with you can explain why... and 2 days is not a lot of time... 2 weeks... maybe 2 months yes...
sometimes folks really mean break up when they need a break sometimes they need a break...
as for dating a younger man being difficult... I don't think so my BF is 13 years younger than I am and we are just fine.
of course we are 38 and 51 and age in general makes more maturity.
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